Tuesday, January 15, 2013

The Bachelor Sean: Falling...in Love

I love that they opened the show with Sean minus his shirt.  In my last blog post, I said that was fine with me and gall darn it...ABC listened.

The first date card arrived and it was for Sarah.  A helicopter arrived to whisk her and Sean away to a tall building in downtown Los Angeles.  Just as I predicted, they are trying to turn The Bachelor into Fear Factor and our happy couple gets to drop to their death 35 stories at a high rate of speed.   They survive, bond over the experience and then drink Champagne.

They talk ad nauseam about the fact that Sarah only has one arm but is just like you and me.  She tells Sean a story about how she was refused the right to zip line in Las Vegas because of her disability. She thanks him for making this happen for her.  Sarah tells him that she's looking for adventure.  Que the song Born to be Wild!   Sean had fun and gives her the rose. They kiss.

Meanwhile, a group date card arrived and prompted them to Capture The Romance.  Next thing you know they are at a castle with their prince charming...and Sean.  They will be competing for Seans heart a three cover deal with Harlequin Romance Novels.


Kristy (the model from Wisconsin) is so excited!  She does a perfect impression of Buddy the Elf when he finds out Santa is coming to the mall. Daniella wishes she'd washed her hair extensions. We find out that Robyn doesn't like Tierra and compares her to a hurricane.  Not sure is she means the storm....or a strong drink. When it's Kristy's turn to perform...she seduces Sean and earns the jealousy of every women in the room.  Twenty four eye balls sending her daggers!  Kristy wins the contest and pees herself.


They all head to a pool party and vie for Seans attention.  Leslie gets alone time with Sean but keeps talking about the weather every time he makes a move on her.  Kacie manages to switch from the friend zone to the girlfriend zone and she is so happy that she laughs maniacally and scares me.  Tierra won't join the group and sits off to the side stuffing her face with biscuits and giving the other girls the evil eye.  She is not here to make friends!  Sean notices her angst and tells her he really likes her and wants her to trust him.

Katie (granola yoga instructor) is feeling uncomfortable and thinks everyone is fake and full of shit.  Kacie talks her into leaving by telling her tales of her past experience on the show. Kacie gets the rose for reducing the food bill that ABC has to pay.  Organic Veggies are expensive!! 

Desiree (a Katie Holmes look-alike) gets the last one on one date.  She's taken to an art exhibit where she meets up with Sean.  They are there to see a very important sculpture by a wacky Russian artist. ABC is trying out a new crossover show called Candid Camera....they are leaving poor Desiree alone in the room with the sculpture and then it falls over...shattering into a half a dozen pieces.  Oh ABC, you pranksters you!  Sean comes clean and takes her to his house for dinner and a little hot tubbing.

They are getting along great!  They are comfortable with each other and discover that they have very similar backgrounds.  There is chemistry and sparks, she's goofy and sarcastic.  They are like boyfriend and girlfriend!  She gets a rose!

At the cocktail party, Sean has a nice chat with Lindsay and realizes that so many of these girls have the qualities he's looking for in a wife.  He has a chat with Robyn who asks him what his type is because he's got three black girls on Team Sean.  He tells her that he doesn't have a type and has dated all kind of people....even a persian girl.  I call Bullshit.  I've seen Shahs of Sunset on Bravo and there is no way a persian girl has dated him.  No freakin way!  Selma tries to teaches him Arabic, after he told her he was fluent in farsi and she spoke to him in farsi and then he had to admit that he only speaks texan.

Amanda.....is sitting on the couch in a daze.  She looks like she's missed a day of her meds and is about to eat Sarah's other arm.   Some of the girls try to include her in the conversation but she's not really there...she's left her body and is hovering over the pool listening in on other peoples conversations. I'll call her Sibyl from now on.

Say goodbye to Brooke and Dianna who I don't remember ever seeing before.

Tierra, 24 from Denver. Instant connection with Sean, got first first impression rose, not here to make friends.
AshLee, 32 from Houston.
Lindsay, 24 teacher from Missouri.  Wore wedding dress.
Catherine, 26 from Seattle.
Daniella, 24 from San Fran.
Desiree, 26 from LA. 2nd one on one date, hit it off with Sean, prank was played on her.
Jackie, 25 from FL.
Kristy, 25 Model from WI.  Won the harlequin romance contest.
Amanda, 26 model from CA.  Off her meds.
Lacey, 24 from CA.
Lesley M, 25 from D.C. Had connection with Sean at photo shoot.
Leslie H, from LA.  Asked Sean about liking black girls.
Robyn, 24 from Houston. Did gymnastics and fell.
Sarah, 26 from LA.  Has one arm, first one on one date, fell 35 stories.
Taryn, 30 from OR.
Kacie, 25 from Ben's Season.  Out of the friend zone.  Convinced Katie to leave the show.


  1. What I don't understand is that the only normal girl on the show has a disability. These girls are freakishly scary! Every. Single. One of them!!!
    They are bizarre to say the least.
    Your recap is spot-on, and I'm laughing so hard I have tears running down my face.

    I'm expecting to see the masked bachelor from Ashley's season to be sporting the wedding dress in future episodes. It wouldn't surprise me.


  2. It is so hard to keep all these girls straight when there are so many. Sounds like ABC is trying to pull out all sorts of tricks

  3. What was up with those swim trunks Sean wore in the hot tub?? Those were hideous!!!!

  4. What the what. He took the one armed girl to climb a building. LOL

  5. Seriously, I might cancel cable, your recaps are so good, I don't even need it. Instead of using up 2 hours that I will never get back, I come here, read your recap, and still feel like I didn't miss a thing. You keep updating and when it gets down to fewer girls, I will jump in and start watching!

  6. Oh, my Bachelor gossip column! Love it.

  7. I’m happy that Sarah got the first date card although I think it’s safe to say that she probably won’t be around to the top three. I’m going to be honest here and say that two episodes in I’m really tired of her talking about her arm: we get it, you don’t have one and if I was in her place I would mention it once, then drop it. My DISH co-worker says that the group date was the cheesiest part of the whole episode and maybe that’s because our circle of friends doesn’t read Harlequin books. I’ve been recording the show on my DISH Hopper this season and I can start watching in the living room while doing the laundry and finish in the bedroom while I’m putting up the clothes. The Hopper gives me full DVR functionality in every room of the house. It’s awesome.

  8. I like Sarah but I think I'm digging Desiree now too. Although, I think her little black dress was not flattering at all. I still like me some Kacie even if her laugh is annoying.

    I CANNOT WAIT to see how or why Tierra fall down the stairs. Karma... hmmm???


I love you. You are my best friend! Your hair looks fantastic today!