Proof that I am Funny

I think I'm pretty funny. I make myself laugh all the time and Calvin rolls his eyes at me which means he thinks I'm funny but doesn't want to admit it.

Now I have proof that I am funny. I'm not as funny as Phil Wilson but I am very close.

Jamie at Blonde Mom blog had a caption contest the other day and my comment was chosen as 'the runner up'.

Go here and check out the great picture and my caption.

Christmas in August!

Wow...that month went by so quickly, here it is time to do some more Christmas planning! I am feeling pretty good about what I have done so far....although I need to devote a whole day just to figuring out the Elf situation.

Christmas in August List of Things to Do:

1. Order two Christmas presents. I need to order a book from Amazon so I am going to find two Christmas presents to buy so I can get FREE shipping!

2. Pick the bath salt recipe that I am going to use for a couple presents.

3. Order another jar from Crate & Barrel ( I bought one to try and it is going to work out great!)

4. Transfer my lists to my iPhone.

5. Watch The Polar Express!



In the back of my mind, I am also thinking about Halloween. I need to devote a day to that planning to. Who's with me?

Fun Extravaganza ~ H

We were a wee bit lazy this week.

Mommy got a new purse! I love that it has a little pocket for my iPhone. Aunt Bobbi says that Green is the new Black for fall. And she knows everything about purses and shoes.


We started out the week without a car because Hubby's car broke down Sunday afternoon (so much for that lucky Praying Mantis) so he had to take the family truckster to work.



Luckily, the car was fixed by Tuesday when we went to the Tree House Children's Museum with our Family Helper, Natalie. This was to be our last play date of the summer because Natalie starts 9th grade on Monday. We are going to miss her like crazy!








The children's museum has a great little room with two train tables in it. Alex loves trains and this is were he wanted to spend his time. Without Mommy. He kept leading me out to the door and giving me a little push. And one time he walked me over to a nice cushy chair and instructed me to sit while he returned to his trains. When more children began to arrive, he was very cross with them for playing with his trains so I convinced him to go see the drum room. He loved that for about 10 minutes before returning to the train room. I once again convinced him that a spot of tea would hit the spot and then we had to go because Mommy was flipping exhausted!
I only got to spend a short amount of time with Mallory...but during that time we went to the 'market and kitchen' area. She loved shopping for food but wanted nothing to do with cooking anything in the little kitchen. She and Nat had a lovely time together! Note to Poopa: Do you recognize Mallory's outfit? It is the one you bought for her. She looks so cute in it!


Before we left the children paid a visit to the one room school house. This is where I got a glimpse of the future.

Mallory.....immersed in her studies.


Alex....gazing out the window.

Wednesday, we had Toga Night. I bought these great silk squares from the internet ( I have going to dye them different colors) and the kids wanted to wear them.


Thursday was Mommy's Field Trip and I found out that Brother Horton came by again. I'm really puzzled how that man knows every single time that I am out of the house for an extended amount of time so that he can come over and work on my husband. I think I'm being tailed by the LDS church!

Friday, we rested because Mommy got home at 1 AM.

Saturday, we went out looking for a big boy bed for Alex. We found one we like but still aren't sure....we sure do miss American Furniture Warehouse in Denver. We stopped in at Sonora Grill in Downtown Ogden for lunch and I was horribly disappointed. We had heard that the food was wonderful so we had high expectations. Table side Guacamole sounded just fabulous but turned out under-spiced and bland. We ordered the lunch sized portions of Camarones Mojo De Ajo (prawns in garlic sauce with greens and rice) and Lime Chicken with Coconut Rice. Both dishes lacked flavor and were not worth the $14 price tag. I did enjoy the two salsas' and giant tortilla chips. And the Granada Mojito was great. I told Calvin the only reason I would come back would be for a cocktail before a movie and he reminded me that you can't do that in Utah...you have to order food. Welcome to Chutah!

That reminds me. Our new phrase when we discover something ridiculous or humorous about Utah is....Welcome to Utah! Well, Alex is a parrot lately and he coined our NEW phrase.

Welcome to Chutah!

Chutah is what he calls pizza.....

We got great news this weekend! Nana, Poopa, Uncle Drew AND Uncle Robbie are coming to see us next weekend! We are so excited! We have not seen them since Christmas.

Speaking of Musicals

I had the pleasure of sitting next a very nice older lady from Sandy last night. She told me that they had been up to Idaho on a little vacation and stayed at a really great Bed & Breakfast. I just googled it, like she told me to....and it is really cool!

Lions Gate Manor

All of the rooms have a theme, such as Persian Dream, Roman Bath, Victorian Suite, Secret Garden and Medieval Chamber. But the best room is called The Phantom's Lair and it is all about The Phantom of The Opera! I loved this musical and the movie so much! What a great idea for a room.

From the website....

Amenities:

• A 100 square foot Theater Room all decked out in red velvet curtains, complete with the phantom's pipe organ, surround sound, sub-woofer, and more!
• Christine's dressing room vanity with full length mirror (the one through which the Angel of Music sings to her).
• Other special features that will be better experienced than talked about here. The Phantom"s Lair will be most appreciated by those who are familiar with and enjoy the Phantom of the Opera.
• 10 foot ceilings
• A King-sized bed with luxurious pillow top mattress
• Imported hand-carved furniture
• Air-jetted bathtub featuring chroma light therapy and optional aroma therapy
• Large tiled shower
• DISH network/TV/DVD and internet
• Sound-proofing in walls, ceilings and floors
• Lush wall to wall carpeting
• Zoned central air conditioning and heating
• A delicious breakfast

Click here to see pictures! This place is only 111 miles from me and I would love to sneak away to this place with my hubby!

About Last Night....

I love Musicals! I was introduced to them for the very first time (kind of) on the most romantic night of my life. It was November 1, 2003....we had only been dating for a few weeks, when Calvin took me on a date in Downtown Denver. We ate a delicious meal at Gumbo's and then we walked to his favorite Irish Pub. We were wrapping up our evening and walking back to the light rail station when we passed The Hotel Teatro. I mentioned how I have always wanted to stay there. Next thing I knew, we were walking into the lobby and checking in!

The next morning, we happened upon the Denver Performing Arts Complex. We looked at the information on the upcoming Broadway Musicals and then Calvin purchased season tickets for us!

For three years, we attended all of the Broadway Musicals that came to Denver and even saw Mama Mia in New York. We loved dressing up and enjoying a night out on the town, going to our favorite restaurants before the show. I enjoyed this new part of my life so much and I would have never experienced it, if not for Calvin. He turned me into a thoroughly modern Connie!


That is why when I found out that my friend Loralee was performing in a production of Thoroughly Modern Millie at the Pickleville Playhouse in Bear Lake all summer, I knew I had to go.

Last night was the night. I had been giddy with excitement all day and couldn't wait for 4 pm to come around so that I could head up. I met Loralee at Costa Vida for dinner (YUMMY, Sweet Pork) and then we headed out to Bear Lake. It is such a beautiful drive and the Lake is the most amazing shade of blue!


Loralee had to be there early to do her hair, make-up and sound checks and she let me go backstage! I'm sure that she had no idea....but I was so happy and excited that I almost peed my pants! It was amazing to watch everyone getting ready and they were so nice to me. You heard me. Some Mormons were very nice to me. Here she is before the show...that would be TWO Diet Cokes in her hands. It is a dang shame there isn't a lick of caffeine in there. Pickleville Playhouse does not serve caffeinated beverages!

And here she is with Miss Flannery! Doesn't she look stunning?

Thoroughly Modern Millie is a great show. This cast is just wonderful. Everyone has the most spectacular voices and they are probably the best looking group of people I have seen in one place in Utah. I had to keep reminding myself that I was in a little cabin theater and not Broadway in New York! I waited patiently for Loralee to make her appearance and I was blown away. She is a classically trained Opera singer and she is amazing. And she is so dang funny! There was another character that I loved from this show. He played the role of Ching Ho and he is the cutest! Imagine if you will, someone 6 foot 4 inches tall, playing a chinese man. He totally pulled it off and I told Loralee that I might be crushing on him a little. Note to husband....I love you and would never run off with a cute little Mormon boy.

Well, Chistopher ended up needing a ride back to Logan and I found out he is 18, just graduated from high school and getting ready to go on his mission. That's right, I'm old enough to be his very young mother!

I staggered in the house at 1 am and dreamt about the show all night! I had so much fun and it was such a thrill for me to be backstage with all of these amazing people. It is an experience that I won't soon forget and one that I desperately needed. Being home with two small children can be very monotonous and sometimes you just need a little adventure to feel like yourself again.

Thank you Loralee for a great evening! I can't wait to see you in your next production.

Photo Credit

Nanny Cam

A month ago, for our 4th Anniversary, we hired our regular babysitters and we went out to dinner. We don't have a Nanny Cam because they are two very nice Mormon girls and we trust them. On my Mac there is a application called Photo Booth and you can take pictures or record video with it. I often record the kids dancing or saying funny things. Today I was getting ready to record the kids in their cowboy hats and I noticed a recording that I didn't recognize. It was my living room in the video but I didn't know the person in it. I was a little startled.

And then I recognized them....our babysitters! Then were playing around with my computer and recorded themselves. It is really funny!

Fun Extravaganza ~ G

I decided to change up this whole 'letter of the day' plan. We are now doing letter of the week. This week was the letter G....lots of great things start with G. Girls, Gum, Green and Grass.

On Monday, we made frozen Grape pops. They were very refreshing on a hot summer day!


On Tuesday, we made some postcards from cereal and other boxes. Alex and Mallory colored on the back....we love sharing our artwork with our family!


On Wednesday, we went to Orton Park and Alex got pushed around by some kid (again). Not sure what is going on around here....but these kids need to be learning some manners! I'm getting ready to research and tour the private schools in the area because I do not want the kids going to public school with these hooligans. Homeschooling is looking really good to me.


On Thursday, I discovered that Alex is truly trying to ignore me. He tore pieces of a paper towel and stuffed them in his ears.


Friday, we went and had lunch with Daddy. We stopped and picked up burgers and shakes from Burger Bar in Roy and ate on a blanket outside of Daddy's office. Daddy loved showing us off to his co-workers.

Check it out....Daddy and Uncle Robert in twenty years!

On Saturday, we made Smores in the microwave and Alex and Daddy loved them so much that they told Mommy that they loved her very much!

This morning, we went to Lowe's Home Improvement store because Mommy needed more potting soil because someone keeps unpotting her plants. We checked out the new snow blowers and Daddy wished for one so he wouldn't have to break his back shoveling snow this year. Mommy commented that if we buy one, it will not snow. We discovered that Lowe's is a great place to entertain the kids' and it is free!



When we got home....Calvin found this on the driveway.

Supposedly, finding one of these is a sign of luck, a good omen. Unless of course, you are a bug or her husband.

** ** ** ** **

I am excited for this week....I am going on a Mommy Field Trip! Thursday night, I will be traveling to Bear Lake to see my wonderful friend Loralee perform in Thoroughly Modern Millie at the Pickleville Playhouse. She plays Muzzy Van Hossmere and I'm so excited to hear her sing!

Uh-Oh SpagettiO's

This is my weekend to do the food shopping for my family. Every two weeks, I go through all of my recipes and select a plethora of tasty meals to make for them. I put much thought into this and try really hard to make several new recipes a week.

I can no longer do this. There will be some changes around here......

On Tuesday, while I was grilling chicken and vegetables, Alex escaped from his spot on the couch where he and his sister were watching the Yo Gabba Gabba episode about sharing.

I found him upstairs, slathering Vaseline all over his legs and arms. Alex has very dry skin and we put special lotion on him everyday....apparently he needed more.

I chased him around the kitchen trying to remove as much Vaseline from his limbs as I could. Calvin came home in the middle of this and said he would handle it. I went back to preparing dinner.

I called them to the table and discovered that they had all been outside, under the deck in the dirt pile. Vaseline + Dirt = Mommy drinking Wine!

** ** ** **

Yesterday, I am grilling dinner again. This time the kids are outside. They have lots of toys out there and generally play nicely. I am in and out of the house...grilling and cooking noodles on the stove.

I come out and don't find the kids. I find them under the deck in the dirt pile....but at least there isn't any Vaseline involved so I let them play there.

A few minutes later, I come outside to find this.



And then Mallory fell....




And this is why we will be having SpagettiO's for dinner from now on.

Fun Extravagana ~ Weekend Trip

We haven't been on a trip in almost a year. Alex's behavior when we went to Denver last year cured us of ever wanting to leave our home overnight again. Have you ever gone on 'Vacation' only to return more stressed out and tired than before you left? That caused me to make a 'no travel' rule and anyone that wanted to see us had to come to Utah.

Calvin is hell bent on taking Alex to Denver for one of his Bronco Game trips so I thought we better test the waters and see how he would do.

We chose Park City because it is a resort town and only 90 minutes from our home. I have fallen in LOVE with Park City. We felt tranquil, welcome and normal there. Incidentally, I didn't see one LDS church, but we did find a Jewish Temple and discovered that the reason that we felt so content was because Park City has a large Jewish population. It reinforced my belief that we are supposed to convert to Judaism.

We also enjoyed the large wine and beer selection at the liquor store, the many restaurants and shops, the beautiful scenery and places that are open on Sunday. We found out about many activites that we will attempt next year when the kids are a little older.

We loved our condo at the base of Park City Ski Slope...it had TWO bathrooms. Alex slept on the pull out couch and did great! We were so proud of him. We swam in the pool and spent some time visiting Historic Main Street. We ate lunch at Main Street Pizza and Noodle and weren't impressed. The Pizza was only okay and didn't reheat well at all. Calvin and I shared a Calzone and the cheese wasn't melted in the middle. That is what we get for choosing the first open restaurant!

For dinner, we went and picked up food from Nick's Greek Cafe. It was wonderful! We had gyro meat, spanakopita (my favorite), dolmades and pita wedges. The entrees come with a salad that was amazing...fresh feta, cucumbers, onions and a couple kalamata olives. I loved every bite! This is the most authentic Greek food I have had in years.

In the morning, we enjoyed breakfast at Good Thymes, and went to Whole Foods on the way out of town. The kids' had fun but were very happy to be going home. We are thinking of making this a yearly August trip that would make the perfect last get away before school starts every year. We are only three years away from sending Alex off to Kindergarten. Where does the time go?

Interesting facts about Park City Utah

Park City is one of the few Utah towns established by non-Mormons and it once had 27 saloons lining the streets.

Park City was a mining town but was nearly a ghost town after the city was flooded. Skiing brought people back in the 1950's but it wasn't until the 1970's that the town began to grow.

Josh Kelley and Katherine Heigl (from Grey's Anatomy) were married in Park City in 2007.

Bill Engvall is is from Park City.

** ** **

And now we return to our daily lives of snacks, parks and letter's of the day!
I leave you with the best dressed Moose in Utah!

Just Say No to Tropic Thunder

My children observe and imitate everything that I do so it is so very important that I set a good example for them. I am constantly thinking about the kind of people that I am teaching them to be. I want them to be kind to everyone no matter what someone's religion or skin color or if they are disabled in some way.

That is why when my friend Lori told me that the movie, Tropic Thunder had some scenes in it that are insulting to people with intellectual challenges, I became livid. The movie has coined the phrase 'Full Retard'. What a horrible thing to call people. I will be truly heartbroken if my children ever called someone that. It is reprehensible that anyone would use that word to describe anyone. It is malicious and mean.

Some will say that this falls under freedom of speech. And perhaps it does. But let me tell you what.....I will not show my children, friends and family that I condone the use of that word by spending any money to see it. EVER. I must show them that there is nothing funny about being hurtful and mean.

My family is boycotting Tropic Thunder and I suggest you do the same. And if I haven't convinced you. Read this.

A few changes...

After a lot of thought, I decided to become Master of my Domain. Get your mind out of the gutter. It means that my blog, the place where I come to share my life with friends and family all over the country would no longer operate under the blogspot free ride. I wanted to own my little piece of the internet.

So....when I decided to make this big leap and also buy some vibrating panties to make housework more interesting.....I discovered that there are lots of Chronicles out there in cyber space. And there is already a Weiss Chronicles.

I enlisted the help of my little Sister to come up with a brand new name for The Blog. We kicked around all kinds of names that had the word cherish, childhood and nuture in them. You know, words that evoked feelings of happiness and love. And I tried some that showed my love of the Mac. Most of these domain names were taken. Here are the ones that we came up with.

iBreeder
Dripping Sunshine
A Cherished Childhood
Stop Licking Your Sister
iMommy

Pop Tarts & Poopy Pants

I had all but given up and was going to just go with Dripping Sunshine when Bobbi called me with the perfect Blog name that really reflects what is going on in my home and my life. It perfectly describes US!

The Young & The Relentless

So in the next few days you will see the name change and you will be directed to my brand new domain....where I am the Master!

http://www.youngandrelentless.com/

Horton Hears a Wino

I thought it was over.

I was present when Brother Horton came over last week to retrieve his book about how a nice Jewish boy became a Mormon and I witnessed Keith's 'we don't want to convert and we like our 'lifestyle' as heathens and yes, your religion sounds very nice but we aren't interested speech'. Brother Horton made one last appeal...I think it was to me, telling me that he had 10 kids and each time a new one came, he got a raise at work. God provided for them because they did what they were supposed to do and were good Mormons. That's great and all but Keith gets raises whether we are Mormons or not. Nice try though.

We bid him farewell and then we had a beer. Because that is what heathens do.

Last night, I had just finished my Margarita, that I had to have because of the spider situation and was in the middle of planning our trip to Park City this weekend. I had just put the addresses for the two liquor stores into my contacts so that we could easily find them when we arrived.

Anyway....9:30pm. There is a knock at the door and it didn't even occur to me that it was Tuesday night and that it could be Brother Horton calling.

It was him.

He wanted to talk to Keith. I went and tore him away from his World of Warcraft game and he returned with this:



He brought us a bottle of Grape Juice and asked us to replace it for one week with 'the other stuff'.

I love wine. I love it so much that I sent text messages (that Horton must be intercepting) this week, to my Sister and Brother-In-Law professing my love for wine. I don't drink it everyday....but at least once a week I like to unwind with a couple of glasses. Usually around Friday.

Wine makes me a better Mother. Sometimes, a glass of wine, enjoyed in the bathtub, at the end of a hard day of crying and changing poopy diapers is all I need to be right again. I just don't see Grape Juice having the same effect for me.

Wine has gotten me pregnant twice!! Alex and Mallory might not be here today if not for my love of the drink. Grape Juice doesn't make me Horny Baby!

I enjoy wine with food. Steak, cheese and bread, just taste better with wine.

Plus, Jesus turned Water into Wine! Jesus is a fan! Jesus must have loved wine!

Stay Tuned for my new favorite iPhone Application! Horton's going to love this one!

August: Fun Extravaganza ~ Day Six

What can I say about the letter F. We love to have Fun, Fire is hot, Daddy loves Football, Aunt Bobbie's horse is going to have a Foal and don't forget about Grandpa Fred!

I got Fabulous news today. My internet Friend Denise, of Eat, Play, Love read my post about being disappointed.....she lives in Colorado and she informed me that my favorite restaurant, Maharaja was alive and well in Boulder! I was so happy! Thank goodness Denise reads my blog!

Mallory had her 15 Month Well Baby Check today. I think she thought we were doing something special together. She was so happy in the waiting room with my undivided attention.

Her appointment went well, she is 22.4 lbs and 29 inches tall. We got bad news though...Dr Church says no more bottles. We tried to argue that Suri still uses a bottle, but he didn't know who we were talking about. Mallory expressed some interest in converting to Scientology if she could keep her bottle. She was cracking me up.....she was fascinated with something she saw in the office and kept asking me, was tat!

Here it is:

Sweetie, that is called a tel-e-phone. It is connected to this thing called a landline. We don't have one at our house and we haven't had one with a cord on it in many years. Your Daddy did own one when I met him but 1985 called and they wanted their phone back.

We had two activities today! In the morning, we made Mini Oatmeal Muffins (Fuffins) and we had Peaches and Cream milk that both kids rejected.

Faffee & Fuffins

After dinner, we went to Zeppes in Ogden and had Italian Ice and Frozen Custard! Me and Mal love the twist custard! This is going to be a weekly treat for us, because it is the perfect end to a hot Utah day.
And I can't resist the num, num noises that they make when they eat it!

Oatmeal Muffins

1 cup old fashioned rolled Oats

1 cup buttermilk

1 large egg, lightly beaten

3/4 cup firmly packed light brown sugar 

1/2 stick (1/4 cup) unsalted butter, melted and cooled

1/2 cup applesauce

1 cup all-purpose flour 

1/2 teaspoon salt 

1 teaspoon baking powder 

1/2 teaspoon baking soda 

1/2 cup dried cranberries or currents or fresh blueberries

** ** ** ** ** ** ** 

In a large bowl, mix together the oats and buttermilk and let stand for 1 hour. In another bowl, mix together flour, salt, baking powder, and baking soda. Preheat over to 400 degrees and grease 12 muffin tins or 24 mini muffins Stir the egg, sugar, butter and applesauce into the oats. Add the flour mixture to the oat mixture and stir until well combined. Fold in the fruit. Fill muffin cups. Bake until golden brown.....20 minutes for regular sized muffins and 15 minutes for mini.

The Hobo Spiders

When we moved to Utah, someone put a flyer on my door alerting me to the danger of the Hobo Spider. It told about how dangerous they were and that they are venomous and their bite leaves a red blister that develops into a lesion that leaves a scar. It can take years for these to heal.

I was freaking out! I had a new baby and was pregnant and I had to be on the look out for these dangerous spiders. Keith told me that I was over-reacting and whoever left the flyer was just trying to scare me into hiring him.

Hobo Spider Nest

Every time I found a spider I would catch it and run to the internet to look at pictures. I am convinced that one time I did catch a Hobo Spider and I put it in a little Tupperware container and made Keith take it to work to show it to Utahn co-workers. No one could ever verify that it was or wasn't.

Hobo Spider Bite

I have lived in fear of every spider I see.

And very well I should. Our yard guy was just here to spray our lawn because we have grubs. He also does pest control applications and he brought to my attention that I have 18 Hobo Spider nests on the side of my house. They are in and above the landscape rocks that the kids play in all the time. It is a flipping (Mormon F word) miracle that the kids haven't been bit. Apparently, all of my praying to protect them have been working.....

While Jason was showing me the nests, three baby Hobo Spiders crawled out of the lawn and across the sidewalk. This the lawn that my kids play in every single day....barefoot.

Jason just finished spraying for the spiders and I will now have it done every 3 months. It is the best $45 I will ever spend!

Now I need a freaking DRINK!!

August: Fun Extravaganza ~ Day Five

Some letters are harder to work with than others. E is one of those letters. There are the obvious....Elephant, Envelope, Ear, Elbow and Easel. It was a struggle for my Mommy brain to come up with those.

On Tuesdays during the month of August we will be visiting our favorite parks. We are starting with the Lomond View Park. It has breathtaking views of Ben Lomond Peak and is one of the largest parks in our area. It has many trees, a softball field and covered picnic area. I like that the playground is shaded and has benches for weary Mothers' to sit and relax.









On Tuesdays we also enjoy the company of Natalie...my Mother's Helper. I originally hired her to help me out when we went to our weekly park playdate so that I could visit with the Moms'. Those get togethers fizzled out but we still go to the park with Natalie every week. The kids' love playing with her and I get a little bit of a break.




Mallory spend the majority of her park time trying to climb onto the end of the slide. She was successful and was so very excited and proud of herself!

See you tomorrow!