Thursday, January 6, 2011

When Your Husband Gets Old

A couple months ago....iKeith told me that at one time in his life he wanted to take Swing Dancing lessons.  I thought that was kind of odd because he's really not much of a dancer and every time I've mentioned lessons he's declined.  We talked about it and he informed me that he's too old to Swing and I suggested that perhaps he'd be more comfortable taking Square Dancing lessons.

He laughed at me and said he wasn't THAT old yet.

Then this came in the mail.

And then this.

Last week, I got this in my email box and I forwarded it to him.

He didn't think it was very funny.  I thought it was hilarious because under restrictions it said...Must be able to walk at a fast pace and under highlights it said alcohol-free environment....which I thought should have been a restriction.

Other signs that my husband is getting old....our medicine cabinet. 

I always knew I was a trophy wife but now it's coming true!


My friend Anne just send this to me.

Since more and more Seniors are texting and tweeting there appears to be a need for a STC (Senior Texting Code). If you qualify for Senior Discounts these codes are for you. Please pass this on to your CHILDREN and Grandchildren so they can understand your texts.

ATD: At The Doctor's
BFF: Best Friend Farted
BTW: Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered By Medicare
CGU: Can't get up
CGIU: Can't get IT up
CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center
DWI: Driving While Incontinent
FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was
FYI: Found Your Insulin
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!
GHA: Got Heartburn Again
HGBM: Had Good Bowel Movement
IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL: Living On Lipitor
LWO: Lawrence Welk's On
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner
OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas.
PIMP: Pooped in my pants
ROFL... CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing... And Can't Get Up
SGGP: Sorry, Gotta Go Poop
TTYL: Talk To You Louder
WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?
WTFA: Wet The Furniture Again
WTP: Where's The Prunes?
WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil
GGLKI (Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking In)


  1. ha, ha!!! HILARIOUS!!! My wake-up call was when I had to change my military ID to "Retired". Now, as a 32 year old, I'm a RETIREE'S wife clogging up the commissary waiting lines for all those active duty spouses. :o) It kills me!!!

    The AARP card would put me over the edge though. I don't think he's received one of those yet. When he gets it, I swear I'm framing it.

  2. iKeith is a Frederick? Love it! :)

  3. @Christina....iKeith is also RETIRED military! They call him Captain at work.

    @Barb....He's the second so he goes by his middle name.

    @Heather...He's also been paying a lot of attention to those Hoverround commercials.

  4. too funny! I think you should definitely sign up for square dancing behind his back and take him on a secret date ;)

  5. A card carrying member no less! Poor iKeith.

  6. We are So there already. I get my AARP card in a few years. The list is funny, but we must add one --IFAICGU. Anyone want to guess?

  7. Look, today I am comment at your site. Yeah!!!

    And you totally are a trophy wife. :)

  8. @Kablooey....I've fallen and I can't get up!

    @Jen...YAY!! And thank you!

  9. Ok i had to re read the first part. I thought you said Ikeith wanted Swinging Classes. Like you know put your watch in a bowl Swinging. Ok sorry, but I read fast.

  10. Those codes are hilarious! iKeith better get those dancing shoes out!! :)

  11. My hubs kept getting info from AARP and he was about 30 at the time lol...turns out they were meaning to send it to his dad who has the same first name but not same middle ename

  12. @This Daddy....iKeith couldn't handle Swinging. He can barely handle me. :)

    @Shortmama...I thought that was what was happening here too...but the paperwork says II. They have the right guy!

  13. Oh! And in today's mail. Some info about hip replacement. I'm not going to tell him about that one...

  14. I'll tell you what, I can't wait until I'm old enough to install one of those chairs that attaches to the stair banister. I bet your house will be there before mine, dammit.

  15. What about peeing your pants laughing b/c your HIGH-larious blogging friend is so dang funny?

  16. @green v neck...those chairs are awesome! If we can attach his hoverround to the stairs we'll be in business!

    @deb...I hope I didn't make you pee your pants!

    My hubs gets AARP cards in the mail all the time cuz they think he's his dad. 60 some years old! lol
    I LOVE the new txting for seniors. haha!

  18. That is too funny... My hubby was old when I married him, so now he is ANCIENT!! I WAS a trophy wife, now I'm OLD, too. :-)
    I'm a card carrying member of AARP at 45 because hubby is a member, gives you some great discounts.
    Make sure to tell iKeith to ask for his discounts when he goes out places, Bill LOVES his senior discounts. HaHa

  19. The way my shoulder has been feeling I may have to join him. LOL And I love those text abbreviations.


I love you. You are my best friend! Your hair looks fantastic today!