Sunday, December 7, 2008

Welcome To Utah!

I'm starting this new feature here at my little blog so if you love Utah or you don't want to hear me bitch and moan about Utah then you can skip this post. I will be back to blowing sunshine up your butt tomorrow. Maybe.

You see....when a transplant to Utah encounters something bizarre or frustrating or stupid about Utah. The natives will pat you on the back and say, 'Welcome To Utah.' Which you would think is very nice but it means....Sorry you are stuck here and yes, things here are jacked up.

There have been a number of things that we have found irritating about this place. The lack of quality seafood, the lack of ethnic restaurants, the lack of alcohol in a mixed drink and the lack of Starbucks stores. But the scenery is AWESOME! Okay. So there you go...I don't hate everything.

Yesterday, my little friend showed up just as my husband was leaving for Denver. You know this friend...the one that makes you crave carbs and chocolate and wine and makes your insides twist and hurt. Anyway, my little friend wanted Pizza and then when I pulled out the Domino's coupons she decided she wanted a Philly Cheese Steak with extra provolone and Doritos and a Coke. She was jumping up and down she was so happy.

So...I got online and ordered a cheese pizza and a sandwich. Then I saw they had this kick ass thing where you could track your pizza! Cool! Then it said my order was cancelled. Poop.

I called. The dude told me he was meaning to call me. Because their delivery guy was having car trouble so he didn't come in to work. So....he couldn't deliver my order. I was dumbfounded.

From Wikipedia:
Domino's Pizza, Inc. is an international fast food pizza delivery corporation headquartered just outside Ann Arbor, Michigan United States. It was founded by Tom Monaghan. There are currently about 8,500 corporate and franchised stores in all 50 states and 55 countries.
Get the Door, it ain't Dominos...their NOT the Pizza Delivery Experts!

I told the guy...that he was working at DOMINOS...and that their job is to deliver pizza. He said he was sorry. And then I asked him if they only have one delivery driver. He said YES. One delivery guy for a 20 mile radius. So I asked if another Dominos with a delivery driver could bring me a pizza and he said no because I am in HIS delivery area. Lucky Me.

Papa Johns brought me pizza and wings about an hour later...apparently they only have one driver too.


My husband is at the Bronco game and it had been on for about an hour when I decided to check and see how they were doing. I went to all the usual channels and then ESPN. No Broncos. The game is not being shown in Utah. AGH!!! This is the second game we have not been able to see. Freakin Utah!


  1. You need to get out of that Mormon hell hole soon! Sorry Mormon readers of Connie's but I had to say it. I could never live there.

  2. I popped in from SITS after seeing the flipping adorable pic of your little girl in your profile and low and behold...she has the best name ever!
    ---bet you cant guess what MY little girl's name is....

  3. I could do this with Welcome to Alabama too. It could be a weekly feature. How fun.
    Hope the pizza was yummy anyway!

  4. There is no customer service anymore. It's like, well if you don't like it shop elsewhere. It used to be that people calmmered over you for your business.

    Oh and love the new pic on your site! Classic!

  5. seriously?! when a woman needs her pizza, give a woman her pizza! what in the world? do these pizza peeps not understand we are stuck at home and need (and i do mean need) the pizza???!!! thanks for stopping by my blog today!

  6. Ha ha ha ha -- your post is so funny! I think you should do a once-a-week series on this! If you run out of ideas -- I can help supply some! I am sorry you had such a bad time getting your pizza and the game.

  7. Hey, glad to hear you have Papa Johns pizza in Utah and sorry about the lack of adequate restaurants - I would not be happy with that either. We are planning a trip to N.Ogden At X-mas.

    Have a good evening - Kellan

  8. I crave lots of carbs when my friend visits too. ;)
    I cannot believe that state/place that Dominos will not deliver because their driver is having car problems. How annoying! That would have bugged me too.

  9. That is too funny, Connie! When we were stationed at Grand Forks AFB, I would say that to people, "Welcome to North Dakota" when they complained in the winter of the cold. GFAFB is only an hour north of Fargo, so I felt their pain and lived in it for 23 years!

  10. I love the picture in the header. It reminds me of my kids!

    I am guessing you are from Colorado?

  11. Oh dear! I have the best pizza place just 4 blocks away, but they don't deliver, so I feel your pain. 4 blocks can be sooo far when you want a delivery!

  12. oh boy, having been here for a couple years now it doesn't even surprise me. Hope your craving was filled in the end!

  13. What a one delivers to our house in the town I live in...we have a pizza hut about 5 miles down the road...but since we are not in the town limits..they do not deliver to crazy is that...

  14. Okay, I have been reading through your posts, and am laughing so hard. The stories I have about being a non-Mormon in Utah....

    The hour long wait to buy wine on Christmas Eve at the ONE (state owned) liquor store?

    The church newsletter on our doorstep the week we moved in which had our name and addressed listed with the words "we are still finding out about them".

    The amazing decorating skills that seem to be in the genetic code of Mormon women and the BEST.CRAFT.FAIRS.EVER.

    The possibility of disbanding the neighborhood BUNKO group because it could be construed as gambling...

    Oh my... I've got so much to say...


I love you. You are my best friend! Your hair looks fantastic today!