Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Somebody I Used To Know

Dear Lisa, 

I google your name all the time.  I don't know what I'm looking for exactly but I think I figured out that you have two boys.  I bet they have your curly blonde hair and blue eyes.  

I still can't believe that our lives didn't turn out exactly like we planned them when we were thirteen. How fun would it have been to live next door to each other so our kids would grow up together?  

It wouldn't have worked out anyway, because I don't live in our old hometown and your kids are much older than mine.  I also can't see our husbands hanging out, drinking Bud Light. Keith's more of a Fosters kind of guy.  My life is very different from the one that we had planned.

I'll never forget all of the good times we had together or all the trouble we got into.  I will always remember we both dated the same boy in 8th grade.  We were so cruel to him! 

I can't hear about the TV show Dallas, talk about roller skating or drink a orange wine cooler without thinking about you. I'm still mad about how badly your Mom treated you and your 8:30pm phone curfew.
And on May 15th every year I close my eyes and wish you a Happy Birthday.  
I've never had a best friend like you again in my life.  Someday, I'll tell my daughter all about you and I hope that she has a best friend but I hope she gets to keep hers for a lifetime.
I wish you well and pray that you have a new best friend because you deserve one.  

If I could dedicate a song to you on the radio today, it would be this one.  
Your Old Friend, 

Lisa and I met in 3rd grade and were friends until we were 24 years old.  I was divorcing my first husband when her fiancĂ© had a problem with her going to the bars with me and made her decide.  Him or me.  She picked him.  I haven't seen or heard from her in 17 years.

Linking up An Open Letter to Somebody That I Used To Know with MamaKat.

Mama’s Losin’ It


  1. that's really sweet. I've lost tough with a lot of people over the years but thankfully fb keeps me filled in ;)

  2. Why does it get harder and harder to stay in touch as we get older? Just part of life I guess, but we always have the memories.

  3. What a sweet friend YOU are.

    There's something to be said about old friends. I have one I talk to 2-3 times a week and she lives 5 hours away.

    Memories are good. Sometimes even better when you know you're not the 'same girls' as you were back then.

    You're a good woman, Connie. I'm lucky to have found you!

  4. What a sweet post. My childhood best friend just moved back home to Alabama, and we just took right up where we left she never left. It is so weird! This post has truly touched me more than you will ever know.

  5. Its funny I was just thinking about writng my open letter to my friend I had in grade school. So much has gone unsaid, but I often think there is a reason we drifted apart. Although she will always be part of my youth and memories, she is not in my adult life for a reason. FB has proven that if someone wants to find you and reconnect they will reach out to you.

    Thank you for writing and aying many of the same thoughts that I myself have thought about this young girl I was always with in my youth. You are a brilliant writer.

    Stopping by via Mama Kats, have a great weekend.

  6. That is incredibly sweet Connie - I have a best friend that I talked to daily and now we barely exchange Christmas Cards - it breaks my heart to think about it. But I think people move in and out of our lives at different times. We all change as people.

  7. Oh, I can totally relate to this post. I lived through a similar situation where my best friend was forced to choose. She also did not choose me.

  8. This happens a lot. Why don't we ever choose the friend over the boy???

  9. Oh what an awful way for your friendship to end. So sorry that she was forced to make a choice like that.
    We all do need a best friend in childhood like that

  10. That is really sad! Is there any chance you could look her up on FB and reconnect? She may be open to that now that she's more mature and has more life experience.

  11. That's really sweet and sad. :(

  12. Such a bittersweet letter. It made me think of my BFF from high school and it's so true i will never find another friend like her.

  13. sad but very sweet i like this idea

  14. I can't imagine being forced to choose and I think when a guy makes his wife do that it speaks volumes about his character. I'm glad you choose to remember her for the wonderfulness she brought to your life instead of focusing on how your friendship ended.

  15. I can't imagine being forced to choose and I think when a guy makes his wife do that it speaks volumes about his character. I'm glad you choose to remember her for the wonderfulness she brought to your life instead of focusing on how your friendship ended.

  16. I have a lost friend or two... And I think this was very brave. Totally agree with Mama Kat - remembering the best parts of your friendship and not the way in which it ended speaks volumes about the high quality friend that YOU are!

  17. I couldn't agree with these other comments more - it takes a big-hearted person to get past the hurt and remember the good. You'll be better off in the long run for having that attitude. I hope some day you're reunited and it's as great as you've probably imagined it could be. :)


I love you. You are my best friend! Your hair looks fantastic today!