Thursday, September 23, 2010

Riding The Storm Out

Back in Utah...I tried to join a club for Moms. It didn't work out. iKeith tried to tell me that I was too old for the Utah demographic because most Mormon girls start their families right out of high school and I also probably wasn't carrying a nice enough diaper/handbag.


My children desperately need friends. iKeith has tried to infiltrate the local click here at the apartment complex when he and the children go out for walks. He met a young Mom (the ring leader) with two kids that were the same age as Alex and Mallory but we don't fit in with this demographic either because we're educated. For example...this woman's husband was at the pool the other night when a wind storm hit. I watched him holding an umbrella attached to one of the tables and it appeared that he was having trouble closing it in the storm. iKeith arrived home and I told him that I thought this man needed help because he'd been in this position for over 10 minutes.

iKeith rushed to the pool and offered this man help.....but he said he didn't need it. He was just holding the umbrella and was going to ride the storm out.  So then we listened to this song for an hour and laughed at that guy.

A few weeks ago, I decided that I was going to join the local chapter of this club for Mom's and come hell of high water they were going to like me no matter how old I am or what color my purse is.

I went to the website and found there was a chapter for a neighboring zip code but not for MY zip code and the message clearly stated if you are not in the 4 listed zip codes then don't bother contacting us.

I'm not one to break rules or not do what I'm told so I shelved the idea and started looking for apartments in the right zip codes.  Then a few days friend Denise suggested that I look into this club for Mom's because it really helped her when her kids where small.  I explained the situation and she told me she has a friend who has a friend in that chapter and she'd help get me in.

I was all over this idea until I told iKeith about it and he said, 'Are you sure this is the best way to make friends?  By forcing this group to take you?'  Damn him and his wet blanket!

I had already emailed the chapter and asked to be admitted even though I didn't live in their zip code.  There was emailing back and forth and then I was handed off to someone else and they wanted to know why I wasn't trying to get into the chapter that WAS in my zip code.

As far as I knew from their zip code didn't have one.  I apologized and said that I'd gladly join that club if they could just tell me how to get ahold of them.  A few days later I received an email that contained the name of the president of the local chapter with her phone number.  She doesn't have an email address and the chapter doesn't have a website.

I've put off contacting this person because I now face being rejected by a new demographic.  People that don't have iPhones and don't tweet or facebook. I'd be willing to be that they don't BLOG either. These are probably not my people.  I'm really trying to avoid a conversation like this one.

I think I'll just ride this storm out until I move to a better zip code!


  1. OMFG I am still laughing! HAHAHAHA This is totally the demographic I live in. HAHAHA (I am not the blond here, I am the "oh well my kid had mac and cheese for dinner Biotch!") Seriously, I am going to pee myself.... :D

  2. I really feel your pain about the demographic issue. I am kind of the opposite. I am 26, no kids, and have been married for almost 5 years. I'm pretty sure everyone at church thinks I am infertile. Actually, I know there was a rumor going on about it. I'm sure you are a great mom and your kids are lucky even if they don't get into the "group." They will probably end up more unique and well rounded than the other cookie cutter familties out there.

  3. Oh my gosh that was funny. Sheer genius :) I wish I had something to offer you - I was never big on mom's groups, but then I don't like people :) and really they were more about the moms. What about the local parks & rec? Are there any classes? Or gym time you could take them too, with other kids there?

  4. Connie - who wouldn't want to be friends with you? You are the nicest, funniest, coolest mom around!! I agree with Jen, those mom groups are way too clicky. Maybe you could sign them up for classes.

    Are they old enough for preschool? that is a great way for them to socialize.
    Good luck!


  5. Tell you what, why don't you just move to Oregon, and we'll start our own Mom's group? :)

  6. LOL!!!

    Connie, I gotta give it to ya... I've been in Bumble Northern KY for 8 years, with kids the last 4 years, and I don't try to network with anybody around here...on purpose!! lol!

    Hang in there, I'm sure the right neighborhood and group of mom's will come along for you and your family!

  7. That is the funniest thing I have seen all WEEK!

    So, which woman are you?


  8. Tell them to take their zip code club and shove it up their arse. Tell them you and Ikeith are swingers and then see what they say.
    Start your own club. Do it

  9. Maybe you could start their website and get them hooked on blogging and tweeting.

    I don't fit in with any demographic here either. I'm too liberal even though I'm just middle of the road, I'm too hippie (not really), I'm too old and I'm too employed. Whatever. My kids can make friends at school.

  10. You are just too funny Connie.

    I do feel for you. I have two kids (ages 9 and 4) and I am 44 (but we are not telling anyone that). Most of the moms with kids my age are much, much younger than me. So we really don't have that much in common. I tried a couple of play dates but it just did not work out. So I just do fun things with the kids and every so often we invite one of the oldest child's friends to come play.

    I would be your friend and hang with you. I don't have an Iphone though (cannot afford the monthly fee) I do have an itouch, a cell phone, and numerous laptops.

  11. Well you always have us normal people in bloggy land to talk to, but that isn't making any friends for your kids. We don't have anything like that around here.

  12. Ugh. It'll happen organically, so to speak. Your friends will be made doing what YOU like to do, and the kids'll make friends that way too. What did you find out about preschools?
    That video is hilarious and scary.

  13. You could start your own mom's group...kinda like I did.
    Is it weird that I'm the only member?

  14. What a funny post - I hope you can make some friends soon - regardless of your postal code! :)

  15. Yeah I have no mom groups near me because I live in nowheresville. But thats ok but I have been around some of the ones nearby and they were too snobby for my taste!

    That video is hilarious!

  16. I think a baby seal just died.....

    What about MOPS groups through any local churches? I have never been to one but had tons of friends who did and loved it. I don't think it is a "zipcode" thing and you don't even have to attend that church to go to it!

    I saw that you went to the library this week on 4square!!! Yay!!



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