" Follow your heart, but be quiet for a while first. Ask questions, then feel the answer. Learn to trust your heart." ~Author Unknown
As part of a little project at BlogHer, I am writing you a letter. You have had a rough 38 years and much of it is my fault. When I was a teenager, you were so tender and open that you allowed me to fall in like with a different boy every couple weeks. You didn't know any better, you loved everyone!
As I got older, I didn't listen to you as much and instead I let my head take over. I thought I was being smart. If I had listened to you more...perhaps I wouldn't have committed to relationships that weren't right for me. I gave you away to men that didn't deserve me and they returned you to me in very bad shape. If I had listened to you and had confidence in myself, I would have realized that I didn't need a man to be happy and being with just anyone was a bad idea. I'm sorry for all of the times I got you battered and broken. I'm so sorry I didn't follow you.
You know that I had to build that wall around you and completely shut you out. I just couldn't bare the pain anymore and life seemed bleak anyway. As with most things, time began to heal the wounds that I inflicted on you. I built a nice little life for myself and realized that I didn't need a man in my life but I wanted one and I wanted love. True Love!
You know how hard I worked on myself and I told you many times that things were going to be great someday. I told you that our dreams would come true and someday we would be happier than we ever imagined. You were skeptical. I couldn't blame you....you had been through a lot.
The thing is....I believed everything I was saying.
And then it happened. Love, like I had never known! Fate helped a little and I found the man that I was supposed to be with and you inflated like a balloon... full of love. I listened to you and you were right. I look at Calvin and you flutter. When he and I are apart...you ache. When he holds me...you melt!
And if that wasn't enough to completely heal you from the past wounds....I had Alex & Mallory and now you swell inside my chest as if you are too big for my body.
I'm amazed at how far I have come, dear heart. When I think back on all of the pain, and how hopeless things seemed it feels like someone else's life. I can't promise that you won't ache and that you won't break again....but I can promise that I will always trust you.
What is your heart telling you? Are you listening?
How to Meditate.
Meditate Application for the iPhone.