The Bachelorette...The EnD!

GOODBYE JILLIAN

I just have to say that I am so freakin glad that The Bachelorette is over! I was bored to tears last night! Granted I did just get home from vacation and I was up before the sun putting stuff away and starting laundry so I was a wee bit tired but OMG! Jillian is boring.

I love Jill's family. Her Dad looks like a hoot and her cousin is beautiful right? Her Mom seems really nice and friendly. What a great family to marry into. My poor husband is wishing he had married Jillian right about now....

Let's cut to the chase shall we? I have more laundry and a really long vacation post to write so we don't have a lot of time to waste spend on Jill.

Poor Kiptyn. I think he really thought she was going to pick him and I think her Mom liked him more.

Reid. I still don't feel it buddy. Nope. Glad she said no thanks.

Ed! First...why does he dress like a gay man? And YAY!! She picked Ed! In the beginning of the show when he met her parents....he said something about the new Ed and the old Ed, I said OH! Two EDS? My darling funny (sometimes) husband looked at me and said, 'because you know...two Ed's are better than one!'

This picture is for my brother in law ROBERT. He was complaining that I never put pictures of the guys on my posts. IF he had been paying attention...he would remember that I did in the beginning. Here ya go!

Now we can get onto more exciting reality shows like The Real Housewives of Atlanta!! This thursday!! Don't miss it. Quick someone tell me a southern cocktail I can drink while I watch it with my mystery guest* every week?



*mystery guest.....I'm so excited!

The Bachelorette...Men Tell All

I'm on vacation with my family but I did catch the show last night. I might have been a little drunk on wine when I watched it but after what I saw...I think that is the best way to watch it.

I just have a couple thoughts.

David. You can take your MAN CODE and stick it up your you know what. Your man code is stupid and disrespectful to women. I think Juan is a better man than you will ever be. And what's with the beard? Are chicks recognizing you and you have to have a disguise now?

Wes. I still think you are a loser and if everything you said was not true and you were *edited* poorly...I think ABC would have came forward and said that they did so. But they just showed us MORE footage and you didn't come on the show to defend yourself. Then this new info that your nickname is the Rooster? Yep, I think you are a big C*CK. Good Luck with Laurel....

Jake. I love you.

Looks like Jon's getting some Sexy Time

I've been so busy crossing things off my list of things to do before our trip that I haven't had a chance to even think about Jillian today. I'm not going to recap the show because I thought most of it was boring as heck!

My thoughts.

The date with Kiptyn...scared the heck out of me. I wouldn't be caught dead on the top of that 10 foot pole. I thought they worked together nicely and he was really encouraging. I thought it was funny that everything he said to her this week was pretty much what she said to him in Spain. He's no dummy!

The date with Reid make me feel uncomfortable and I think he blew it by not telling her what she wanted or needed to hear. I thought it was hilarious that she called him a Magic 8 Ball. He was being too cautious and admitted to being indecisive. No girl wants to hear that!

Richie...I mean Ed. I loved his green mankini and was so excited that she got to meet his parents. I don't know what the heck happened in the fantasy suite but I think she should chalk it up to too much sun. They are obviously attracted to each other, they just couldn't make sexy time. I was THRILLED that she picked him.

I'm going to try hard to watch The Men Tell All next week...but we will be on vacation. *fingers crossed* that it works out.

*****

There has been something bothering me for a couple days. That something is Hailey Glassman. You may know her as Jon Gosselin's new girlfriend. The 22 year old that has been arrested and convicted of drug possession. Great role model for the kids JON!

I really have never had much respect for Jon Gosselin. I've always thought he was a little on the lazy side and that he deserved much of the flack that Kate dishes out. I think Jon could have been a lot more helpful through the years.

The final straw for me was the 23 year old school teacher. I've been a spouse that has been cheated on and it sucks. His cheating proved to me that not only is he lazy but he is also stupid.

And now....here is more proof that he is an idiot. Divorce papers were only drawn up THREE weeks ago. I really don't think it is appropriate for him to be galavanting around FRANCE with his new whore girlfriend until he is divorced. Can't he wait 3 freakin months?

I can tell you that if my estranged husband was dating women like this and exposing them to my kids I would be livid! I can't even imagine what Kate must be thinking.

Tomorrow is the LAST DAY to enter the giveaway for the $100 Visa Card! I will be drawing the winning name at 6pm MST tomorrow night!

The Bachelorette...It Ain't Me Dude

Oh Jillian. I was completely prepared to throw things at you this week because you appeared to be the dumbest woman in Canada. But then you gave me hope that you do have a good head on your shoulders.

The group went to Spain for their hanky panky dates. Or as Mama Kat called them...four one night stands.

Kiptyn was first. She has adored him from the start and thinks he is the perfect package with all of the qualities that someone would want to marry. She mentioned his hometown date and how cool his family was. And then she said that his mom was a doll and full of energy. That was code for...your mom is a little overbearing and I'm scared that she might be my Mother-in-law soon. They had some serious conversations and he told her that a proposal seems far off. She was obviously taken back and told him that she wants an engagement at the end of this and that you must take a leap of faith. At the end of the date, she turned down the one night stand saying that she didn't want to get her feelings confused by knocking boots with him. They did cuddle somewhere for a little bit but then she sent him on his way.

Reid was next. She described their relationship as slow to start but that they have physical chemistry and that she's crazy about him. She does question if he is ready. Their date was really funny and romanic (this is how REID says romantic and would be a deal breaker for me), they had a picnic basket and they needed to fill it with food but they don't speak any spanish and found it difficult to order anything. During the date, Reid continually says that he really, really likes her and tells the camera that it could be love but he isn't sure. Jill is giddy around him. Also, no one night stand for him either.

Oh Ed. (sigh) He earns himself a run, hug and squeal! Jillian is worried that Ed is too career driven and is still upset that he left her. They talk about it but I really didn't get an explanation from him...just that he couldn't stop thinking about her. They discussed how she didn't get to meet his family and she asks about them and he doesn't really say much. He also has horrible eye contact skills and it's freakin me out. Ultimately, she invites Ed to the fantasy suite so that she can catch him up to the other guys and by catch him up she means make out for hours.

Last and certainly least is Wes. Before he even meets up with Jill he makes a remark about the music scene in Spain. DUDE. You are here to see Jillian. They meet up and take a bike ride to a picnic where he sits as far away from her as he can, doesn't looks her in the eye and hasn't touch or kissed her at all. She is noticing the lack of affection and when she asks him if he would move to Vancouver for her he just *blinks* and doesn't really give an answer. They he used a great conversation ender....he spilled his beer all over his @ss. At dinner, he was distant and when she again grilled him about Laurel...he slipped up and said that he told some of the guys about his *girlfriend* and that he was with her for 6 years (was she with Wes when she was texting BRAD WOMACK?) Then he admitted that he was there because his manager thought it would be great for his music. And he told her Numero Uno is most important!

At this point, I am yelling at the TV...WALK OUT JILL! KICK HIM TO THE CURB! NO FANTASY FOR YOU PAL! He says he thinks they should use the fantasy suite. I almost lost my mind!

Jillian comes to her senses and escorts him outside to a cab. She says that she is embarrassed that he rode her this far....

And then we had The Most Clearcut Rose Ceremony EVER! And I was sad to see that Chris Harrison didn't make it to Spain. As the guys are standing there...Wes remarks to the guys that he will soon be back home having lots of sex. The looks on the guys faces....priceless!

Jillian comes out and thanks the guys for making her feel beautiful and in love. (expect for you Mr Jack@ss..you know who you are) She selects Ed, Reid and Kiptyn to be her lovers in Hawaii and walks Wes out to a waiting limo.

This is where it got really interesting. Wes says...he is the FIRST GUY on the Bachelorette to make it to the top 4 with a girlfriend! With an ugly smirk on his face he said it's going to take him a loong time to get over this and then says he is going to get his freak on in Spain! EVERYBODY'S GONNA KNOW MY NAME! He says that his acting days are over and that this was just a bump in the road....and he's cutting off the chains. THEN...he said that ED wouldn't even get so much as a nibble back in texas.

Dear Wes *Asshole* Hayden,

First of all, I would nibble ED from head to toe. He is a real man and you...my friend, are a loser! I don't think I have ever hated someone on a reality show before. You are a sorry excuse for a man and I hope to god that no one buys your music. Just because everybody knows your name...doesn't mean that you will benefit from it. If I walked into a bar in Texas and saw your name on the marquee...I would walk out. The only job I really think you're cut out for is delivering singing tele-grams. Or maybe a singing Wal-Mart greeter. Here's the thing...you are just a run of the mill bar band. I've seen my fair share and you aren't anything special. In fact, you are an embarrassment to country music. OH and here's a great title for your next single....It Ain't Me Dude.

Good Luck...you're going to need it.

Please take the poll on the left...thanks!

The Bachelorette...Take Me Home

Oh My HEAD!

My drinking game was a hoot last night! IF I hadn't been doing shots of water and taking small sips of my Screwdriver....man o man!

This week Jillian went on FIVE hometown dates. BOOTS! She started off in Philly with Reid with a squeal. He shows her the city...which looked pretty cool and then she met his parents and two brothers. His mom made a point of telling her that kids gravitate to Reid. When talking to his brothers...they say that Reid hasn't been ready and he finds lots of girls to date but they just disappear. I hope they didn't mean MISSING POSTER disappear and that he just stops dating them. I thought this hometown was BORING!

Next she heads to California to see Michael and he is jumping up and down with joy. He has a twin brother and they trade clothes to trick her and she recognizes him right away. Good Job Jill! She chatted with the bro and feels better about his age and sister Jena shows up from out of the country to meet her.

Still in California, is Kiptyn. He earns a squeal and she's wearing shoes. It appears that Kip's family lives in a giant house and she is worried that she is a hillbilly next to these hoity toity folks. His family has seen The Bachelor and have roped off the hot tub with caution tape. They subject her to a taste test of lasagna and wine. Luckily, she passes and then Kip's Mom grills her for a while (not on a GRILL). Kip and Jill hop into the hot tub while Mommy Dearest is watching them from the window. I'm not sure I'd want this woman for my Mother in Law.

Then she is off to Jesse's Winery again in California and she gets to ride on a little tractor. Note to Jillian: This would have been a good time to wear your BOOTS! You don't wear high heel shoes to a FARM! Jesse admits to her that he is really slow to open up but he feels like they are progressing well. Jill meets the parents and his hairy brother Jacob who I found a little bit sexy! Jacob asks Jill some questions and asks if they've been naked...she says that comes later in the show! Jacob tells her that Jesse is like an emotional Ice Cube. I see Jills face and she has just frozen....

Jillian goes to Austin in Red Boots! And squeals when she sees Wes and she gets to meet the band, drink a beer and listen to him sing. OH JOY! He even sings her the 4 lines of the song he wrote for her and she swoons! CD CD CD! Meanwhile, back at the hotel...Jake has arrived and he fake calls Tanner on the phone to make sure he is doing the right thing. Wes tells Jill he isn't a good liar ( he has said this like 50 times....and now I believe he is an EXCELLENT liar) and wants to make this work.

Jake comes to Jill's room and wants to tell her something. He hims and haws and finally after I threw my notepad at the TV...he spits it out. Wes has a girlfriend and her name is Laurel. Poor Jill she starts crying and threatens to quit the show. Jake tells her to be careful because Wes is quick on his feet. Click HERE to learn more about Laurel.

Wes finally shows up to take her to meet his family and she confronts him...telling him that Jake is here and he says he told him on numerous occasions that he has a girlfriend. He denies it, Jake comes back to the room, he confronts him, he still denies it. Jake leaves and cries in the hallway. THEN...she goes to meet his family anyway.

She meets Wes's Mom, Step Mom and sisters. They all collaborate his story of no girl friend. And why wouldn't they...they need his CD to succeed so he isn't living in their basement anymore. Of course they are going to lie for him. Jillian continues to fall for Wes.

Back in Beverly Hills, there is a knock at Jillian's door and there is ED! A vision in purple argyle! He explains that he got home and couldn't stop thinking about her and realized he made a terrible mistake and can he come back please. She makes him feel just a little bit bad about leaving her like that and says this sh!t is BANANAS (B A N A N A S) but yes! Come to the rose ceremony! I'm so happy!

But now...she can still only give out FOUR roses. Two must go home.

At the rose ceremony, Chris Harrison announces that someone is joining them and Ed walks in. The guys are pissed! I predict that someone is going to beat Ed's @ss after the show. In the end, she sends home....

Jesse who says that he is sad and feels like the rug was pulled out from under him by Ed.

Michael leaves with a broken heart. He admits that he really loved her and that he is going to miss her but wants her to be happy.

Next Week: SPAIN! MORE ED! SQUEAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

David~27 Trucking Contractor from Ohio
*First Impression Rose, picked by Globetrotters as match for Jill, keeper of the Man Code, wants to tie Juan to a tree and beat him, acts like a Toddler, a challenge

Jake~ 31 Airline Pilot from Dallas
*gave her wings, first One on One Date, ab's of steel, perfect

Jesse~27 Wine Maker from California
*turned down Italy for Jill, MVP of Curling, wants to be a Canadian, makes Jillian giddy, Emotional Ice Cube

Wes~32 Country Music Singer from Austin
*singing guy, winner of race & dinner, allegedly has a girlfriend, is just there to sell records, girlfriends name is Laurel.

Michael~25 Break Dance Instructor from New York
*in gay scene with Mike, has a crush on Jill, big goofy puppy, wants to be a young dad

Robby~25 Bartender from Houston
*made her a ROZMO, great movie scene with Jill, agrees with David, left for dead on the train tracks

Ed~29 IT Consultant from Chicago *looks like Denny, popped his helicopter cherry, workaholic, had to leave for work, COMES BACK!!

Reid~ 30 Realtor from Philly
*been in love 1.5 times, cuddly

Kiptyn~ 31 General Contractor from California
*heartbreaker, great chemistry with Jill, charitably

Mike~28 Baseball Camp Owner from NY
*good catch guy, in gay scene with Michael

Sasha~ 27 Oil and Gas Guy from Houston
*looking for the mythical unicorn

Tanner P. ~ 30 Financial Analyst from Dallas
*foot fetish guy, loves open toed shoes, tattle tale

Mark~ 26 Pizza guy from Denver
heartbroken and cheated on, winner of threesome, cheated on 4 times

Brad~27 Financial Advisor from Chicago
*co-winner of race

Tanner F. ~28 Sales Rep from Denver

Juan~35 General Contractor from California
*brought her wine, most hated man in house, dumps out his shots, gentleman, cheese-ass

The Bachelorette Drinking Game

Take a swig of your drink every time Jillian....

• hugs someone
• squeals
• says about in her canadian accent
• appears in an outfit wearing boots
• licks her lips nervously

Do a shot every time.....

• Jillian talks about having kids
• Jillian sits in a hot tub
• Wes mentions his CD

The Bachelorette: The Love Train

I'm writing this with a water hangover because I did my drinking game while watching the show last night. Let's review.

Take a swig of your drink every time Jillian....

• hugs someone
• squeals
• says about in her canadian accent
• appears in an outfit wearing boots
• licks her lips nervously

Do a shot every time....

• Tanner talks about feet
• Jillian cries
• Jake says the word PERFECT

*****

This week the whole gang is going on a train ride abord the Rocky Mountaineer. This train is really cool! Tanner admits that he has never been on a train before (pop that cherry Jillian).
*BOOTS* Jillian admits that she is still missing ED and she hands a date card to Robby and it has his name on it. He's all nervous and meets her in one of the train cars for their date. They make a drink (because he is a bartender) and chat. *NERVOUS LIP LICKING*

Robby tells the camera that he is young and in between jobs. Jillian says she loves being around him but he isn't ready for everything that comes with marriage because he is too young. She hands him the Friend Card and drops him and his luggage off in the middle of nowhere.

The guys watch him de-train and again they are all upset because one of them is leaving. Michael starts crying and Wes tells the camera that he is just there to sell some records. And then he says something that gave me the ickiest feeling in my stomach. Here is the qoute:

The fame that I'll get from this it's almost like I taste it, I eat it and it comes inside of me and becomes a part of me.

Dear Wes Hayden:

I think you are a jack@ss. I will never in a gazillion years buy your stupid album or listen to your ridiculous songs on the radio. If I hear it's you, I will turn the radio off. You have wasted Jillian's and my time and you make me what to throw up.


The train stops in Emerald Lake and everyone except for Reid gets off to go snowshoeing. Tanner helps her with her shoes. *FEET* *FEET* They run around in the snow and play hide and seek. Jake finds her and he slips in a cuddle. He says this experience is surreal.

Meanwhile...Reid is on the train all alone with the crew and a bottle of red and he's asking them all kinds of questions like should he wear his glasses and a hat? I kind of like the glasses...but he is way cuter without them.

The group date moves to a lodge where they will snuggle near a fire and have cocktails. *BOOTS* Jillian and Jake go outside and he tells her that she is like his mom, very nurturing. I don't know about you...but that creeped me out. I don't want him thinking about his Mom while making it with Jill. He says that their conversation was electric but it looked more like it needed a jump start. The guys all come outside and ruin what he was about to do...show her pictures of his Mommy.

She talks with Kiptyn but all I heard was bla, bla, bla, kissy, kissy. And he felt her butt.

Michael asks her what she wears to bed and she says, 'underwear and a tank top but if she's drunk...just underwear.' Jillian, you naughty girl! Tanner decides to start a round of show and tell and whips his pants down to reveal his giant package that ABC has to blur out because it is too sexy for prime time. He is wearing some whitey tighty bikini type panties underwear and he is very proud of them. Jillian looks mortified and tells the camera that she is not ready to see the huge package.

Somehow the poor girl gets some alone time with Tanner and he rubs lotion on her *FEET* (times 7...that's 7 shots!) And he rates them a 9.5. Jesse tells Jill that this is feeling real now and he is having real emotions. Jillian thinks that they have great communication and a spark. Michael gets some alone time with Jill a fire and some marshmallows. He admits that he is the crazy young guy but that he is also romanic. He can't wait for Jill to meet his parents, brother and dog. Jill says that they don't have a physical connection and he is young.

The guys are all talking about the hometown dates coming up and Tanner confesses that he is the mole. Wes gets all defensive and says he hates a tattletale. Then he says that he's gotten what he wanted...publicity for his CD and he can just leave now, or stay and get the girl. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LEAVE!!

Jillian gives the rose to the person whose family she is excited to meet. Kiptyn!

On Reid's one on one date they go snowboarding and he is horrible at it. But Jill is impressed that he tried something new. *SQUEAL* They sit at an ice sculpture table and she asks him what his perfect life is like. He says in love, normal happy family and happy. His ears are red (from the cold) and he tells her that red ears mean that someone is horny.

*BOOTS* They go to a hotel to have dinner and she tells him they are going to have fondue. He informs her that he is a hypochondriac and is against fondue because he doesn't like his raw meat going into a place that meat has just been cooked. Reid...you are a freak! He also admits that physically she is not his type because he likes blondes with big boobs.

They talk *ABOUT* where they would live and he says he isn't worried about it that they would just work it out. Really? You live 2764 miles apart, it will just work it's way out? She tells the camera that they don't have a lot in common but she wants to meet his family. Reid gets the rose.

Chris Harrison is waiting for the train when it returns because the rose ceremony is going to be today! Jillian *HUGS* everyone and goes to chat with Chris about her week with the guys. *KIDS*

At the rose ceremony, Jill is about to get started when she decides that she needs to talk to Michael. She pulls him out into the hall and asks him if he is really ready for a relationship and he tells her that he always saw himself as a young dad. Good Answer!

Jillian sends Jake on the first flight home. He wants to know why. She just tells him that it wasn't right and he says that nice guys finish last.

Tanner also gets the boot and he says that he is heartbroken because his foot fetish didn't seem to bother her (but I think your giant package scared the hell out of her) so he doesn't understand. He is mad that Wes is still there.

And then there were FIVE!

So the previews for the upcoming shows have JAKE coming back. Apparently he has hijacked a plane (he is wearing his cute little pilot uniform) and he is busting in on a date with Wes and telling her that Wes has a girlfriend, which he is still denying. And someone has some trouble in the bedroom. BUT...where is ED. There are rumors that ED comes back while they are in Spain. I NEED MY ED!!

David~27 Trucking Contractor from Ohio
*First Impression Rose, picked by Globetrotters as match for Jill, keeper of the Man Code, wants to tie Juan to a tree and beat him, acts like a Toddler, a challenge

Jake~ 31 Airline Pilot from Dallas
*gave her wings, first One on One Date, ab's of steel, perfect

Jesse~27 Wine Maker from California
*turned down Italy for Jill, MVP of Curling, wants to be a Canadian, makes Jillian giddy

Wes~32 Country Music Singer from Austin
*singing guy, winner of race & dinner, allegedly has a girlfriend, is just there to sell records

Michael~25 Break Dance Instructor from New York
*in gay scene with Mike, has a crush on Jill, big goofy puppy, wants to be a young dad

Robby~25 Bartender from Houston
*made her a ROZMO, great movie scene with Jill, agrees with David, left for dead on the train tracks

Ed~29 IT Consultant from Chicago
*looks like Denny, popped his helicopter cherry, workaholic, had to leave for work

Reid~ 30 Realtor from Philly
*been in love 1.5 times, cuddly

Kiptyn~ 31 General Contractor from California
*heartbreaker, great chemistry with Jill, charitably

Mike~28 Baseball Camp Owner from NY
*good catch guy, in gay scene with Michael

Sasha~ 27 Oil and Gas Guy from Houston
*looking for the mythical unicorn

Tanner P. ~ 30 Financial Analyst from Dallas
*foot fetish guy, loves open toed shoes, tattle tale

Mark~ 26 Pizza guy from Denver
heartbroken and cheated on, winner of threesome, cheated on 4 times

Brad~27 Financial Advisor from Chicago
*co-winner of race

Tanner F. ~28 Sales Rep from Denver

Juan~35 General Contractor from California
*brought her wine, most hated man in house, dumps out his shots, gentleman, cheese-ass

The Bachelorette...Goodbye Ed

I missed the first 10 minutes of The Bachelorette this week because my DVR keeps recording old episodes of Big Bang Theory. So I joined the show while Michael ad Jillian were zip-lining across the tundra of Whistler. It looks like they are having a great time and Michael doesn't look scared like Ed did on his zip line. In fact this is a real zip line that goes fast and stuff. I don't see any chemistry with them...but Jill says she feels 19 again and that Michael is like a big goofy puppy. She ends up giving him a rose and a HUG. He kisses her and she HUGS him.

The group date is a snowmobiling trip into the wild Canadian woods. She invites Robby to ride on the back of her snowmobile so she can pop his snowmobile cherry and makes the other guys ride two to a machine. Why couldn't ABC afford to rent each of them one?

She talks privately with most of the guys feeling them out to see if they have girlfriends. She decides that she can trust Robby and that he is raw & sweet (like sugar?) and she says that she would definitely know if Wes had a girl back home. He also claims that his sister signed him up. Does Wes really have a sister? They all spend a ridiculous amount of time outside and it gets dark and they are standing around this bar made of snow and Jilli decides to awkwardly dance on it.

She is HUGGING everyone. Little to no kissing is going on...looks like David hit a nerve last week.

She and Kiptyn make out, she has a chat with Reid and he tells her that everyone has girlfriends and in fact, he has two wives. Ed...has been holding back and not looking her in the eye. She pulls him aside and he tells her that his boss is pressuring him to come back to work. She HUGS him and then gives him the rose.

Jesse's date card says they are going to break the ice. Oh great more frolicking in the snow. Jilli squeals when she sees him and they fly in a ski plane to a glacier and run around in the snow, make snow angels and stamp out J + J = Forever in the snow and Jill squeals like a pig. I would like to know what the heck you're supposed to do when you need to pee. They decide this is the best day ever and they will remember this day for the rest of their lives.

At dinner later Jilli asks him where he sees himself at 35 years old? He says successful, owning a wine bar, a house, a wife and kids. She is so happy I think I saw her pinch herself. Jesse tells her that her voice is soothing to him...I thought this was really sweet. Oh course, he gets a rose and a HUG. She says there are major sparks but she has to find out if he is husband material. How is she planning to do this? Maybe they could shadow Kate and Jon for a day.

Ed requests a meeting with Jill. He is really sorry but he has to go home to his job. She is really upset and crying and saying his priorities aren't the same as her's and that she wishes he had thought about this before joining the show. I think she was a little hard on the guy. I happen to think it says a lot about his character that he is not willing to be unemployed. He is one of 10 guys...those aren't great odds for him to sacrifice his job to maybe get picked by her and then what? Is she planning to support him? I've always wondered how people are able to put their jobs on hold for weeks at a time to appear on this show....

Fast forward to the rose ceremony. She tells Chris Harrison (like he didn't know) that Ed had to leave that she is really upset about it because she was starting to fall for him but she isn't sure he was THE ONE. She decides she doesn't need a getting to know you better cocktail party and wants to just get to the ceremony and send someone home.

She sends Mark the Pizza Guy packing and in his parting words he tells us that he has been cheated on 4 times. WOW. Either he is dating some really skanky women or he is a doormat.

For next week: The Bachelorette drinking game!

Take a swig of your drink every time Jillian....

• hugs someone
• squeals
• says about in her canadian accent
• appears in an outfit wearing boots
• licks her lips nervously

Do a shot every time....

• Tanner talks about feet
• Jillian cries
• Jake says the word PERFECT

David~27 Trucking Contractor from Ohio
*First Impression Rose, picked by Globetrotters as match for Jill, keeper of the Man Code, wants to tie Juan to a tree and beat him, acts like a Toddler, a challenge

Jake~ 31 Airline Pilot from Dallas
*gave her wings, first One on One Date, ab's of steel, perfect

Jesse~27 Wine Maker from California
*turned down Italy for Jill, MVP of Curling, wants to be a Canadian, makes Jillian giddy

Wes~32 Country Music Singer from Austin
*singing guy, winner of race & dinner, allegedly has a girlfriend

Michael~25 Break Dance Instructor from New York
*in gay scene with Mike, has a crush on Jill, big goofy puppy

Robby~25 Bartender from Houston
*made her a ROZMO, great movie scene with Jill, agrees with David

Ed~29 IT Consultant from Chicago
*looks like Denny, popped his helicopter cherry, workaholic, had to leave for work

Reid~ 30 Realtor from Philly
*been in love 1.5 times, cuddly

Kiptyn~ 31 General Contractor from California
*heartbreaker, great chemistry with Jill, charitably

Mike~28 Baseball Camp Owner from NY
*good catch guy, in gay scene with Michael

Sasha~ 27 Oil and Gas Guy from Houston
*looking for the mythical unicorn

Tanner P. ~ 30 Financial Analyst from Dallas
*foot fetish guy, loves open toed shoes, tattle tale

Mark~ 26 Pizza guy from Denver
heartbroken and cheated on, winner of threesome, cheated on 4 times

Brad~27 Financial Advisor from Chicago
*co-winner of race

Tanner F. ~28 Sales Rep from Denver

Juan~35 General Contractor from California
*brought her wine, most hated man in house, dumps out his shots, gentleman, cheese-ass

The Bachelorette...Moving to Canada

I was all excited for this week of The Bachelorette because we were going to find out who has a girlfriend back home. And then I was bored out of my cotton pickin mind for 1.5 hours.

We start out every episode in the bunkhouse with all of the guys looking all casual and wearing stupid hats. A few like to wear them backwards because they are afraid someone is going to pour something down their neck, some wear hats that are too small for their freakishly large heads and some wear these ridiculous beanie hats because it is cold in California.

This week Chris Harrison told them to pack their bags because they are moving to Canada! Everyone is happy to leave these close quarters and I'm sure Juan is hoping for more rooms to hide from David.

Jillian greets them in a cute grey and black dress at a fancy hotel where she has rented them a 3 bedroom penthouse suite! They have Champagne and appetizers to celebrate their good fortune and then Jill leaves them to choose their bed buddies room mates.

The first date card arrives and it is for Kiptyn. Jill meets him in a park and she is wearing a misshapen maternity jacket and of course, boots. They get into some Kayaks and race to a bridge. She lets Kip win. Then they went shopping for food and went back to her place to cook. She goes crazy over the fact that he came up behind her to kiss her while she was plating the food. I actually liked this date a lot. I've always said that you will find out more about a person doing everyday things than on a fantasy date. Next...I think she and a date should have to take care of a baby. The date goes well and Kip gets a rose.

Back at the Penthouse....the group date card comes and then the two left over realize that they are going on the 2 on 1 date (not to be confused with a Threesome) and they start to panic.

The group date takes place at some Olympic Ice Place and the guys have to learn to curl. They split two teams and have to successfully get their rock from one end to the other to win a dinner date with Jillian that night. The losers have to go back to the penthouse to console each other talk crap about Juan, David and Wes.

The Red Team wins and they all get cleaned up and head to a yacht where they drink shots and eat crab. Jill tells Jake to try to be himself and not so perfect....he looks concerned and later asks David if he is too perfect. David tells him that chicks like a challenge and he is too easy. Then Jill has some alone time on a bed with Jesse. Lastly, she has some time with David. Right away he tells her that he likes her hot @ss and she looks good in spandex. He is feeling a little too comfortable with her and is throwing cuss words around. He leans in for a kiss just after uttering the F word and she pulls away. He is offended and mentions that she has kissed everyone in the house. She says she is not that girl and he tries to touch her shirt. David tells the camera that she is playing hard to get because he is a challenge and she is INTO HIM. Poor stupid David....she's really not that into you.

Jesse gets the rose for being a really nice guy.

Jillian meets Mike and Mark in a park and Mike runs up to her like a girl. I half expected him him to wrap his legs around her waist! Mike comments that he wishes he had thought of that. They walk over to a yellow helicopter where Jill is about to pop their cherry. Off they go, flying over mountains and snow with Mike sitting between Mark and Jillian. Awkward! They land at Grouse Mountain and have a nice meal. Mike is being very open and complimentary of Jillian and Mark is sitting on his hands.

They each get some alone time and Mark over shares about all of the heartbreak he has had, confessing that he thinks he has been cheated on. And here it comes....The Pity Rose. Mike leaves on the equivalent of a Canadian city bus....a gondola.

Cut to the Penthouse....a bell boy comes for Mikes luggage and because they are in a hotel, they don't have to chase him down the hall to see where he is going.

Finally, it is time for the cocktail party and Jillian wants to snuggle with Reid but she knows she needs to talk to him. Wes tells her that he is ready to settle down and have kids and that he has lots of love to give because he has a girlfriend. Jake talks to her about their conversation on the boat and he wants Jillian to know that he really is as perfect as he looks.

Tanner Pheet decides to be the man and tell her what she needs to know about guys in the house. He tells her that some guys have an agenda and someone has a girlfriend back home. She is visibly upset and asks him to tell her who. He won't give her any more info so Jill cuts the party short and goes off to cry and talk to Chris Harrison who is obviously not giving her any info either.

The group is assembled and Chris Harrison tells them that whoever isn't being honest needs to come clean right now. Jillian is trying to find love dammit and she doesn't like to share her toys men. No one confesses anything. A couple of them look slightly guilty and Jake tells everyone that he is going to be pissed to find out that someone has a girlfriend and is taking time away from Jill that she could be spending with him. David wants to know who the tattletale is and Tanner Pheet looks like he is going to throw up. Juan knows it was Tanner and keeps looking at him.


Finally, the ceremony goes on and she sends home Juan and David. At this point I'm concerned for Juan's life and hope he can escape the hotel before David beats the crap out of him. David asks Jillian WHY? and she says 'it just wasn't right' which he interprets as she doesn't know. Dave is sure that Juan threw him under the bus.


Juan is whisked away to safety in a cab and Jillian apologies to the rest of the guys for her behavior.

If this show doesn't pick up pretty soon...I'm going to have to stop watching. It looks like next week there is lot's of crying so that seems promising.

David~27 Trucking Contractor from Ohio
*First Impression Rose, picked by Globetrotters as match for Jill, keeper of the Man Code, wants to tie Juan to a tree and beat him, acts like a Toddler, a challenge

Jake~ 31 Airline Pilot from Dallas
*gave her wings, first One on One Date, ABS of steel, perfect

Jesse~27 Wine Maker from California
*turned down Italy for Jill, MVP of Curling, wants to be a Canadian

Wes~32 Country Music Singer from Austin
*singing guy, winner of race & dinner, allegedly has a girlfriend

Michael~25 Break Dance Instructor from New York
*in gay scene with Mike, has a crush on Jill

Robby~25 Bartender from Houston
*made her a ROZMO, great movie scene with Jill, agrees with David

Ed~29 IT Consultant from Chicago
*looks like Denny, popped his helicopter cherry, workaholic

Reid~ 30 Realtor from Philly
*been in love 1.5 times, cuddly

Kiptyn~ 31 General Contractor from California
*heartbreaker, great chemistry with Jill, charitably

Mike~28 Baseball Camp Owner from NY
*good catch guy, in gay scene with Michael

Sasha~ 27 Oil and Gas Guy from Houston
*looking for the mythical unicorn

Tanner P. ~ 30 Financial Analyst from Dallas
*foot fetish guy, loves open toed shoes

Mark~ 26 Pizza guy from Denver
heartbroken and cheated on, winner of threesome

Brad~27 Financial Advisor from Chicago
*co-winner of race

Tanner F. ~28 Sales Rep from Denver

Juan~35 General Contractor from California
*brought her wine, most hated man in house, dumps out his shots, gentleman, cheese-ass

The Bachelorette...The Good, Bad & the Ugly

I'm happy to say that I'm feeling better about things this week. Finally a few of the guys are standing out and I could see them with Jillian. It still baffles me that they make these guys all live together in a bunkhouse with one bathroom. No wonder they all try so hard on their dates to get a rose and move out.

We start off with a 1 on 1 date with Ed. He is a cutie and looks amazing similar to Denny on Grey's Anatomy.


Jillian took him away in a helicopter where she popped his cherry and they flew around pointing at things on the ground. They seemed pretty cozy and comfortable with each other until they landed on a building and Jill told him they were going to descend to the ground on a rope. Denny Ed is a computer guy...excitement for him is when he waits too long to back up his coding. He looks like he might crap his pants but does it anyway because I'm sure in the back of his mind he is scared of breaking Man Code and David beating the snot out of him.

Did you see that cute sweatshirt that Jill was wearing? They jump into the pool and have a little Hot Tub Harris moment. He tells her that he really likes her and is glad to be there and she says. DITTO. Is this a canadian thing? I've never heard anyone say ditto. Gosh, I hope that doesn't catch on.

They get cleaned up and have a romantic dinner on another roof top and Denny admits that he is a workaholic and is generally guarded. Jillian has a major crush on him though so she gives him a rose.

At this point they brake away to Life in the Bunkhouse and see the crew coming for Denny's Ed's bags and the guys chase them up the hill to see if they are taking them away or to the house. They're all bummed when they take his bags into the mansion.

Next we have a group date with 11 of the guys to a real live movie set where they will be making a little cinema called The Good, the Bad and The Ugly. They all dress up and start do scenes where most of them get to kiss Jillian.

Brad gets to go first and the guys are all critiquing his kiss and say it looks like he is kissing his sister but he thinks he is the Ultra Bad Ass Kisser. Poor Brad. They are all getting jealous and complaining.

Robby's scene with Jillian gave me goose bumps. Both times that they showed it! The funniest scene was the gay one between Mike and Michael. They all head to a wrap party in a penthouse loft and at some point end up in a giant hot tub. Tanner Pheet loses his mind and rubs Jillian's feet all over his face.

She is having a nice chat with Reid and admits that she thinks he is hot. He is about to go in for the kiss when Juan steals her away. He brings her a fresh drink and a blanket. He is such a gentleman!

Cut to Life in the Bunkhouse....David is ranting about Juan again and says he wants to beat his @ss and kill him. This guy is a complete nut job! Jillian gives the rose to Robby and again the guys chase the crew up the hill to see where his bags go.

The last 1 on 1 date is with Sasha who looks like a p()rn star to me. Did you like Jill's denim onesie with the yellow heels? They go to a car museum and take a bunch of pictures of each other. They ride in a Ferrari and then he tells her about a horrible accident he almost died in, that he has never been in love and he is now searching for the Mythical Unicorn. You can see Jillian's expression change and she grabs the rose and tells him that she can't be his Unicorn. Apparently she doesn't give Pity Rose's to the crazy ones....
Poor Sasha is immediately shown the door where an empty bus headed for LAX pulls up for him. Go Sasha...Go find that Unicorn!

Cut to Life in the Bunkhouse....Wes is singing Jillian's song AGAIN to all of the guys and they all look like they would like to cut the strings on his guitar. The crew enters to take Sasha's bags and they all run outside and see them loaded into a Mini Van. Oh no they say...he's gone. She is actually sending guys home!

Wes become very profound and says you can either live life and take opportunities or you let them pass you by. And then he takes this opportunity to sneak out and sing that song AGAIN under Jill's window and she invites him up. They say love don't come easy...but Wes does!

Finally it is time for the Rose Ceremony Cocktail party. David is stomping around, yelling and being a Toddler. He tells Jillian that he is used to being the top dog and he isn't getting any attention, he's not used to sharing and he has no patience. If I were Jillian I would have put him on the freakin naughty step!

Juan saves her takes her away and David becomes even more enraged. Fighting with Mark about him and when Juan walks outside he orders him in the house and then taunts him for doing so.
Tanner Pheet tells the camera that he wants some time with her to talk about more than sports and weather. He is just here to suck on some toes anyway! And when he gets his time and she lays her little piggies in his lap he could not contain his excitement and may have had a little accident in his pants.

And then it was time for the Most Dramatic Confrontation in Bachelorette History. NOT! The Toddler David asks Juan why he is here and he gives a good answer....he says he is 35 years old and hasn't found love. David taunts him some more about being 35 years old and then cusses and walks off. I *think* Robby looks at Juan and said, 'I agree with David', clinks his glass and then says he'll talk to him later. I rewound it twice. How could anyone agree with David? DANG IT ROBBY...I was starting to like you.

Tanner F and Brad don't get roses and David is picked dead last!

In the previews for next week....someone is telling Jillian that there are guys there that have GIRLFRIENDS! Who do you think has a girlfriend?


David~27 Trucking Contractor from Ohio
*First Impression Rose, picked by Globetrotters as match for Jill, keeper of the Man Code, wants to tie Juan to a tree and beat him, acts like a Toddler

Jake~ 31 Airline Pilot from Dallas
*gave her wings, first One on One Date, ABS of steel

Jesse~27 Wine Maker from California
*turned down Italy for Jill

Wes~32 Country Music Singer from Austin
*singing guy, winner of race & dinner

Michael~25 Break Dance Instructor from New York
*in gay scene with Mike

Robby~25 Bartender from Houston
*made her a ROZMO, great movie scene with Jill, agrees with David

Ed~29 IT Consultant from Chicago
*looks like Denny, popped his helicopter cherry, workaholic

Reid~ 30 Realtor from Philly
*been in love 1.5 times,

Kiptyn~ 31 General Contractor from California
*heartbreaker, great chemistry with Jill

Mike~28 Baseball Camp Owner from NY
*good catch guy, in gay scene with Michael

Sasha~ 27 Oil and Gas Guy from Houston
*looking for the mythical unicorn

Tanner P. ~ 30 Financial Analyst from Dallas
*foot fetish guy, loves open toed shoes

Mark~ 26 Pizza guy from Denver

Brad~27 Financial Advisor from Chicago
*co-winner of race

Tanner F. ~28 Sales Rep from Denver

Juan~35 General Contractor from California
*brought her wine, most hated man in house, dumps out his shots, gentleman, cheese-ass

The Bachelorette~ The Man Code

Is it just me...or does something not seem right about this season of The Bachelorette? I am not feeling the love from any of them but maybe it's just too soon.

The very first words in my notes say...David is an A-hole. I really just want to reach through the TV and smack his face. His mouth is irritating me so much and I'm realizing that last week's shy, loss for words incident was all an act because this guy is cocky and has too much to say.

Jillian throws a pool party and invites 8 of the guys. Mike...sneaks off with her and ends up in her bedroom. He hangs off the balcony like Michael Jackson's baby; taunting the guys. Jill admits that there is something she finds sexy ABOAT him and then she leaves him half naked in her room expecting to receive a rose. That had to hurt.

The boys found out that Jillian had left the building and they were supposed to go chase her down in a Mini Cooper. I really liked this part of the show because I love watching men completely lose their shit minds on national television. Mike and Tanner were acting like complete nut jobs and if Joel McHale doesn't add this clip to his show this week I will be surprised.

They all finally find the map in the glove box, follow the clues, change into tuxes, pick up a million dollar necklace and find Jillian. The winners are Brad and Wes. Brad was the brains behind this operation and he is pissed when Jill decides to share dinner with Wes instead of him. I found the dinner to be awkward and I didn't feel like these two had any chemistry. I think Wes might be here to sell a record. She gives Wes a rose.

Jake is chosen for the One on One date with Jillian and she picks him up in a purple convertible. He asks her if she is a good driver and she says, 'No, I'm a woman.' Jill....come on! Some of us are AWESOME drivers. Maybe you should have went with , 'No, I'm Canadian!' She is dressed in the most adorable black fringe dress and red knee high boots. She takes Jake to get a cowboy makeover and he ends up in a ridiculous black shirt with white scrolling on it. But holy AB'S batman...Jake is built!

They go to a private club where they talk, laugh and seem to have a really good time together and then Martina McBride comes out to sing a couple songs while they dance. Jill is surprised that Jake dances so well but DUH...he lives in Dallas....I'm sure it is a prerequisite to becoming a citizen of the great state of Texas. Jake scores a rose!

The 2nd group date is with Jesse, Mark, David, Mike, Simon, Kiptyn, and Juan. They go to the beach to play basketball. They are all having a jolly good time until the Harlem Globetrotters show up and make them look like little girls. The Globetrotters pick David as a good match for Jill and I throw up in my mouth a little. They are all relaxing watching the sunset when Mike comes running down the sand in his speedo and jumps into the ocean. He is WHITE as a ghost from the waist to his knees and I'm sorry to say but there was a lot of room in the front of his suit if you catch my drift. Jill feels sorry for him and he receives the first Pity Rose of the show.

It's time for the Pre-Rose Ceremony Cocktail Party and Tanner P starts off the night by examining Jillian's feet in open toed shoes. He is so excited about her choice in footwear that he starts to get all shaky and drooly. She seems a little uncomfortable and escapes goes off to talk to some other fellows.

Jesse tells Jillian that he turned down a 5 month trip to Italy to be on the show. Is he crazy? Robby makes her a drink called the ROZMO (half Rob/half Cosmo) and tries to talk to her but Wes steals her away.

Chris Harrison comes in and tells everyone that they must vote for the man they want to leave the house. Much himming and hawwing ensues and the guys don't know what what to do. Many agree that they don't like Juan.

Suddenly, Brian can't take the pressure anymore and he brings everyone out to the pool area and strips down to his light switch and jumps into the pool. Jillian is shocked and by the look on her face...a little amused at the size of his light switch.

The results of the voting are announced and the winners losers are...

3rd most votes....Julian
2nd most votes...David
The most votes...Juan

Chris Harrison says that Jillian has veto power and can give Juan a rose right now....or he must leave the party immediately! You know exactly what she does right? She gives him the PITY ROSE! It appears the new Jillian twist to this season is that she will give a couple Pity Roses each week. At this rate, she is going to end up married to the guy that she most pities...not the guy she most loves.

The Most Boring Rose Ceremony ever ends with 12 more guys getting roses.

David~27 Trucking Contractor from Ohio
*First Impression Rose, picked by Globetrotters as match for Jill, keeper of the Man Code, wants to tie Juan to a tree and beat him

Jake~ 31 Airline Pilot from Dallas
*gave her wings, first One on One Date, ABS of steel

Jesse~27 Wine Maker from California
*turned down Italy for Jill

Wes~32 Country Music Singer from Austin
*singing guy, winner of race & dinner

Michael~25 Break Dance Instructor from New York

Robby~25 Bartender from Houston
*made her a ROZMO

Ed~29 IT Consultant from Chicago

Reid~ 30 Realtor from Philly

Kiptyn~ 31 General Contractor from California
*heartbreaker

Mike~28 Baseball Camp Owner from NY
*good catch guy

Sasha~ 27 Oil and Gas Guy from Houston

Tanner P. ~ 30 Financial Analyst from Dallas
*foot fetish guy, loves open toed shoes

Mark~ 26 Pizza guy from Denver

Brad~27 Financial Advisor from Chicago
*co-winner of race

Tanner F. ~28 Sales Rep from Denver

Juan~35 General Contractor from California
*brought her wine, most hated man in house, dumps out his shots

And now for the guys she didn't keep.....Julien, Simon, Mathue and Brian.

You remember Brian...he is the dude that striped neeked and jumped in the pool during the cocktail party. His closing comment was that she might not have picked him because he was hung like a light switch and it was chilly out. I'm sure that David would agree that it states in Man Code that one doesn't unleash their manhood in temperature below 85 degrees. And then there is the issue of SHRINKAGE. He obviously doesn't know the first rule of Man Code...if you are hung like a Light switch then for goodness sake....Keep The Lights Off!

David better get a copy of The Man Code out to everyone of those guys ASAP!

On a scale from Zero to Bilbro....I rate this episode a 5.

The Bachelorette ~ Get The Party Started!

I have been waiting oh so patiently for The Bachelorette: Jillian Harris Edition to premiere. Even my husband (who swears every single season that he is not going to watch this trainwreck show) was asking me when it was going to start.

A few months ago, I even did a post on my shopping blog about what I would wear if I were Jillian. I was thrilled when they showed her going shopping for her wardrobe! What a lucky girl!

I had the best of intentions for preparing to blog about this season of The Bachelorette. I was going to take notes and rewind lots of it to get quotes and I was going to drink wine! The first thing I did was trade my wine for an ice cream sandwich which kind of killed the mood for me. Then, as the guys were going introduced...I didn't like any of them. Except maybe that one guy that says he lives in Denver. But I only liked him because he lives in Denver. And the Billbro guy (real name GREG) was totally grossing me out! I almost threw up. And then the guy....the one that called her HOT TUB HARRIS! I would have sent his ass packing immediately!

Did you catch the breakdancing faceoff? I was kind of impressed that these guys could pull off these moves in their sunday best and that Jillian kicked off her shoes and tried to learn a few steps!

The show finally got exciting for me when the Fabulous Five walked in! Oh a twist! I do love me a good Chris Harrison Twist! The newcomers are Ed, Bryce, Reid, Tanner P, and Mike. I loved that Mike threw her a baseball and said, 'You are a good catch!' Totally loved that!

I was curious about why she kept Simon from England because the guy needed subtitles! How much fun will their conversations be? It was sweet that he wanted to make her a spot of tea....but I never did see her talk with him. Maybe the subtitle translator was tired from the introductions.

I have to comment about the First Impression Rose. My understanding is that you give it the person that most impressed you. Someone that stood out. Not the guy that froze up and couldn't speak. It's not called the Pity Rose!

During the rose ceremony....I couldn't help but laugh at Stephen (the lawyer from New York City) because his face was hilarious! He was obviously upset that he wasn't getting a rose and on his way out the door to the limo said that Jillian must not like AWESOME guys! LOL! Here is who she kept:

Dave~27 Trucking Contractor from Ohio *First Impression Rose
Jake~ 31 Airline Pilot from Dallas *gave her wings
Jesse~27 Wine Maker from California
Wes~32 Country Music Singer from Austin *singing guy
Mathue~ 26 Personal Trainer from Wichita
Michael~25 Break Dance Instructor from New York
Robby~25 Bartender from Houston
Ed~29 IT Consultant from Chicago
Reid~ 30 Realtor from Philly
Simon~ 26 Soccer Coach from England *thick accent guy
Kiptyn~ 31 General Contractor from California
Mike~28 Baseball Camp Owner from NY *good catch guy
Brian~ 32 IT Consultant from Atlanta
Sasha~ 27 Oil and Gas Guy from Houston
Julien~34 Restauranteur from San Diego
Tanner P. ~ 30 Financial Analyst from Dallas *foot fetish guy
Mark~ 26 Pizza guy from Denver
Brad~27 Financial Advisor from Chicago
Tanner F. ~28 Sales Rep from Denver
Juan~35 General Contractor from California *brought her wine

If you would like to read more posts or link to your post about this season....run on over to Mama Kat's.