What Not To Do At a Dinner Party

About a month ago, I watched one of the Harry Potter movies....I think it was the fourth one and it had that scary smooshy faced guy who you aren't supposed to talk about in it.

I commented to my husband that he looked like our friend John.  Except John has a nose.

And then I told John's wife and then I thought the better of it and told her to please not tell John.

Over the weekend, we were all gathered together at a friends house for dinner.  Debbie had gone to the restroom and John says to me, 'so you think I'm ugly huh?'  I denied thinking this with much head shaking.  Then he said, 'you think I look like Voldermort.'

I then had to try to explain myself and reveal that I secretly have a thing for bald guys....but he wasn't having it.

Debbie came back in the midst of the chaos and I told her what happened.  And this is when she yelled at him in front of everyone that he wasn't supposed to tell me that she had told him that I thought he looked like the scary smooshy faced guy.  I guess I know who I won't be telling my deepest darkest secrets too.

And I will think twice before telling ANYONE that they look like The Dark Lord.

*******

Have you ever caught your husband looking at someone's boobs?  I have really never caught iKeith looking at another woman or he's super good at concealing it.

I snapped this picture at the same party and I captioned it.....Are you sure you don't want to hear about all of the apps I've made for the iPhone?

Someone on facebook noticed that it looks like iKeith isn't really looking into her eyes while he's talking to her.  I didn't even notice!

What Not To Do...Selling a House

Whenever I see a house for sale near me....I'm always compelled to look for it on Realtor.com.

We aren't in the market to buy a house because we have zero money for a down payment but I can't help looking for houses for sale.

Does anyone else have this affliction?

No, just me. Great. Let's not tell iKeith. I've convinced him that it's a chick thing.

There is a townhouse for sale directly across the street from me.  I'd never in a million years what to live there because they are all squished together with what looks like cardboard for walls.  This beauty is only $100,000.  What a freakin bargin!

I started looking at the pictures and I just shuttered.  What is wrong with people now days?  You put your house up for sale....you HIRE a realtor to sell it.  They tell you that they are going to take pictures.

There is NO excuse for this.  None.

First of all. You all know that I adore having a laundry room IN the house but I'm not sure I'm crazy about it being in the kitchen. Check out all of the water containers. Are they growing pot somewhere? Are they very thirsty? Diabetic? I have to go pee just looking at the picture.

Torture Room

I'm calling this one the torture room because of the bare naked light bulbs.  This room would have been super easy to tidy up before the photographer showed up.

Hey Target

I'm calling this picture HEY TARGET.  Is this their next home?  I'm so confused by why these folks have a Target cart because up until a few weeks ago....the closest Target to this house was 6 miles away. Just so you know....there is a facebook group for people who steal carts.  I wonder if Target would make me an honorary Crazy Christmas Lady if I told them where their cart is?  But seriously, you have STOLEN property in your backyard.  Do you remove it before the pictures are taken?  Something to think about.

This just proves that I've GOT to get out of this neighborhood.  I'm surrounded by idiots....and killer squirrels!


"I'm sharing my awesome with Momma Made It Look Easy and you can too.